How Do You Know when to Smile?
Autistic People Are Not Emotionless but Expressions of Emotion Usually Don't Come Naturally to Us
Most people don't need to learn when to smile, when to frown, or when to cry out in pain. Many autistic people do. Even after autistic people learn such things, they often don't come naturally, they are often still conscious affectations. I've become used to smiling to indicate pleasure but it is not an automatic occurrence.
After years of studying them, I can imitate the normal and expected emotional expressions common to non-autistic people in most instances. However, if I am in emotional or physical distress, I find myself unable to mimic the expected expressions, tones of voice and reactions. This is especially problematic in dealing with health care professionals. Many of them do not listen to the words you are speaking but to your body language, facial expression, and tone of voice. Even if they know you are autistic, they don't seem to know it on a gut level and don't know how to react if you are apparently unemotional or don't make noises when they cause you pain. In my experience, in spite of physical evidence to the contrary, they will react as if the autistic person is not injured or ill.
The flip side is true, too. I must consciously smile if I am pleased or happy if someone is around to be upset by my facial blankness. I can be happier than a pig in mud and I still have to remember to smile. My often blank expression was so troubling to people that I try to keep a smile on my face no matter what I'm feeling. It's easier to remember a single expression, and a smile, even if not really appropriate seems less upsetting to people than no expression at all.
Many people deny that autism actually exists. Others assert that if you are able to communicate at all you are not autistic. Both groups are wrong.
Autism is real. I am a high-functioning autistic. Other people have autism issues far worse than mine. But I think it's the job of those of us who are high-functioning autistics to help other people understand something of what it is like to be autistic.
Sources:
Life experience as an autistic person.
http://www.squidoo.com/coping_with_Aspergers
Published by Kylyssa Shay
Kylyssa Shay spent 18 years as a professional floral designer and has aquacultured marine life for fun and profit. Ms. Shay is a freelance writer, an atheist and an avid life-long learner with unusual life e... View profile
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