How to Let Yourself Be Vulnerable

I know a lot about being vulnerable. I am a woman who considers herself a little bit more emotional then most. I had to learn the hard way that I could not just put all my feelings and emotions out there without scaring off my boyfriend. I had just lost a great man due to my being to emotional and overly sensitive about things. I just did not know how to handle my emotions and share what I had to with him. At that moment I decided to reevaluate my situation, I had to come up with a strategy to be able to be me but not scare the people that meant the most to me. So far it is working I have had my guy for a few months now and he keeps asking me when am I not going to be so perfect. Here are a few things I have learned over the years. I realized my boyfriend is not my girlfriend. They do not need to know it all and in intimate details. Guys do not want to hear us complain and whine all the time. They find this a weakness and men want strong independent women. Do not get me wrong all men have a hero complex, when you need the pickles open go to them right away! But otherwise keep the little things that do not need to be told to him out of the conversations. For example do not cry over bad hair, bad fight with a girlfriend, or the bad tuna you had that day. That stuff can easily be told to your girlfriends and he really wont mind missing those details. The important stuff you need to open up about, like relationship stuff and details about him or yourself can be a place to open up and be vulnerable. But try to be strong about it, do not go into the conversation in tears. Guys hate tears they tend to panic when they see us crying. So try to be strong, be clear about what it is you want to say, and do not be afraid to open up. If you really want to get close to a guy opening up about your feelings and your want for him is never a bad thing. Just try to go about it the right away, do not attack him at strange moments, like during a football game or on a drive to a friends house. Try to keep it when you two are alone and are really focusing on each other, then he will more then likely respond the way you want him to. He is going to be excited that you feel the way you feel and express how he feels as well. Just make sure you keep these conversations for intimate moments and do not expect him to open up all the time. Men tend to hide their feelings but as long as he can see your being open and your relaxed about your feelings it will relax him as well. Try to go by these rules and be confident that how you feel is not a bad thing, it is just how you express it and when is the key to a healthy lasting relationship.