How to Lift Your Daughter's Self-Esteem While Encouraging Weight Loss

Childhood obesity is a real health concern for parents, but how does a concerned mother or father go about helping a child lose weight without hurting their self-esteem? What about if that child is a female? While addressing weight loss with your child is difficult enough, the problem can be compounded when dealing with a daughter. Media influences, friends, and even your own views on health and beauty can affect her view of herself for life. So how is a parent to lift a daughter's self-esteem while actually encouraging weight loss? The good news is, most children are capable of understanding that weight issues must be addressed. Keep the following tips in mind to help your daughter reach her optimal health level, both physically and emotionally, no matter what the scale may say.

First and foremost, focus on health when addressing your daughter's weight loss, not appearance. Depending on your daughter's age, she may take your weight loss conversation quite personally. Young girls of elementary school age aren't likely to be preoccupied with their physical beauty just yet, but daughters at the age of eleven or above are already scrutinizing the mirror intensely. While you might be concerned that your daughter will be at risk for teasing if she doesn't lose the pounds, don't make it known. She will likely interpret that "concern" as embarrassment on your part.

Next, encourage your daughter to sign up for an athletic program. Soccer, softball, basketball, volleyball, and anything that will get your girl running and jumping for hours at a time each week is sure to take off the pounds. Not only that, but sports are proven self-esteem boosters for young girls and teens. Do be sure, however, to keep in mind that your daughter's needs for nutritious calories will rise with increased activities. Healthy snacks should be allowed before and after each practice and game, and healthy food should never be denied a highly active child or teen at regular intervals.

As the pounds begin to fall off, make sure that shopping is still a fun and rewarding experience without going overboard. Rather than celebrating every single pound dropped, make the necessary adjustments in clothing sizes and try to quell any over-zealous behavior you may wish to exhibit. While she may celebrate as she pleases, you must be aware that commending her on pounds lost during shopping excursions must be done carefully. Your daughter must know that your concern is her health, not her jeans size.

On that note, be sure to refrain from making so-called "pretty promises" to your daughter as she is losing the weight. She will likely become frustrated during her journey to better health during stalls, but reassuring her that she will be "beautiful" in no time is not the way to go. Many parents, especially mothers, tend to get excited for their daughters as they lose weight because they are aware that doing so may help increase their self esteem and the likelihood that they will enjoy their femininity. However, your daughter can enjoy a great self-esteem and being feminine as she is, and promising a better life in the future merely due to weight loss would be doing her an injustice.

Finally, never punish a daughter for not losing weight within a certain time frame. This is where things can get tricky. If your child has bad eating habits and tends to get grouchy when you encourage movement and exercise, you may be tempted to react to this bad attitude by doling out warnings and punishment. Try to remember that if your daughter feels that exercise and eating properly are chores, rather than normal behavior, she may develop a resistant attitude toward them for the rest of her life (making life-long weight battles much more likely). Rather than treating resistance to weight loss as a wrongdoing, treat the problem as more of a bad habit that must be broken. New habits must simply be put in place to replace the old, and that takes time.

Remember, it's the side comments and quick glances right now that will make a difference in your daughter's self-esteem as she is taking on her weight loss challenge. Alluding to better beauty or a better lifestyle, becoming over-zealous, and/or using punishment as a means of enforcement will only add to the likelihood that she will develop self-esteem issues. Encourage fun exercise through sports or activity involvement, help her with her bad habits, and get her off to a healthy start in her weight loss journey.