How to Maintain a Happy Marriage

The key to maintaining a happy marriage is simply this - never let a day go by that you don't let your beloved know how much you appreciate them and care for them.

Often when we are in a relationship for any length of time, we tend to take for granted our significant other and forget what it was that attracted us to them in the first place. This can be a very dangerous situation, especially when you become distracted by other temptations and illusions that are out there to woo you astray.

The phrase "the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence" may suggest a better life beyond your own, but remember, you still have to mow the lawn and weed the garden to keep it looking lovely & fresh once you get there.

So, what are some things that you can do immediately to begin strengthening the bond with your betrothed?

1. Recognize what your partner does well, and comment on those strengths.
No one wants to be put down or belittled all the time, and unfortunately many marriages turn into nagging competitions where we focus on the negative aspects of the person or relationship that frustrates us. Identify the positives and play those up instead. For every single negative point, come up with four positive points to counter balance it.

2. Do something nice and unexpected for your spouse.
Definitely do nice things for your husband or wife on special occasions (birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, etc.) but in addition, try to do something memorable on a regular, otherwise uneventful, day that will brighten their outlook and make them feel appreciated.

3. Spend time together.
Common sense, but after several years together you may find your paths taking different directions. Make a conscious effort to plan "we time", not just "me time". Even if you don't share common interests, show your support by attending an event or being actively involved in your partners hobbies by asking questions and/or going along for the ride.

4. Review photos from happy times.
Maybe your wedding day was the most memorable, or that time you went camping and forgot the tent? Whatever the situation, find the happy pictures and relive the fun & excitement! Why not put together a coffee table scrapbook that you can enjoy with your spouse whenever you like or share with your friends and house guests? It'd be a great daily reminder of precious time enjoyed together.

5. Take pride in your relationship.
When you speak to others, try to say only positive things about your husband or wife. Don't commiserate about your spouse's shortcomings, but rather, be a champion touting their outstanding qualities. Soon you'll be amazed at how fortunate you feel about your great relationship, especially when you become the envy of all your co-workers, family and friends. Strive to make your marriage the very best it can be, each and every day!

Lori St-Germain is a freelancer who lives in the Adirondack mountain region of upstate New York. She is an accomplished writer, graphic/web designer and dedicated wife. She has two children (miniature schnauzers) named Scooter and Radar. To contact the author, please write to lori@jingledog.com .