How to Maintain Long Distance Friendships

One of the hardest transitions in life is when your best friend moves away. It leaves an empty space in your life that little else can fill. But it doesn't have to be this way. Here are a few suggestions on how to have a healthy long distance friendship.

Don't eliminate any of your communication options.

Talking on the phone is the best way to keep in touch. Most friends chat on the phone, and one of them moving away doesn't have to change this. Cell phones have free long distance, and land line phones have plans that make long distance inexpensive.

But some people don't like talking on the phone. If you're like this, just keep in mind that while it doesn't have to be constantly, an occasional phone call would be nice. If you truly hate the phone, though, the internet offers a great alternative. Similar to a phone, instant messengers allow you to have real-time communication. But if you don't type so fast, e-mail might be a better option. Just remember that if someone sends you a two page e-mail, your response shouldn't be a one-liner. You could also try using a networking site like Myspace to keep in touch with your friends.

Old friends and new friends don't always mix.

When one of you visits the other, you may be tempted to invite your new friends over as well. Perhaps you have a routine where you spend every weekend with your new friends. But your old friend didn't come to watch you socialize with your other friends. When tossed into a situation with a bunch of strangers, it'd be easy for your old friend to feel out of place and unwelcome. This is especially true if all of you drink alcohol except for your old friend. If you'd really rather be with your new friends, be honest with your friend before they come to visit.

Don't ask of others what you aren't willing to do yourself.

If you aren't willing to travel to see your friend, then you shouldn't expect them to come see you. You may have many reasons why you can't visit your friend, such as your family is in the area and you want to be with them if you come to town. But whatever your reason, you have to realize that it isn't your friend's responsibility to make sure you remain in contact. That would be a one-sided friendship and it isn't fair to the other person.

It takes a lot of effort for long distance friendships to work. Friends have to be considerate of each other's feelings. And remembering that isn't as simple as it seems once you've moved on and made new friends. Long distance friendships can work as long as both people are willing to try. One person cannot do it alone.