How to Modify Your Car for a Derby

Derby racing is the purest form of automotive sports. It has everything for everybody: Speed, storylines that develop and play out during the event, plot twists, drama, random fires igniting, babes, tools, dudes who act like tools while working on their cars, etc. How can the average man/woman get in on this kind of action? It's about tricking out your ride.

Weld, weld, weld.
Hey, you know what would be pretty cool? Welding a bunch of scrap metal to your Toyota Prius. Derbies are all about slamming into other motorists, in an attempt to disable their automobiles. Not only will adding a bard exoskeleton to your flimsy, fuel efficient pansy mobile make it more durable, but it'll look awesome seeing all that extra stuff fall off during the race.

Move stuff around.
It would be a good idea to rearrange important components that make your car go vroom-vroom. Move that engine to the glove compartment. Turn your lucky rabbit's foot into a hood ornament/spike, and use it to impale other cars when ramming into them. Obviously the rabbit's foot won't impale anything larger than a sausage link. You can use it as guide to help line up potential victims.

De-glass your ride.
Your windshield hates your guts. It never really liked the constant staring, bug carcasses, or choice of air freshener hung on his best friend, rear view mirror. When given the chance, windshield will shatter and try to cut you in the process. Take a hammer to all the glass iin your car, and get rid of it prior to the derby.

Get insured.
Ever hear of Intentional collision Insurance? Yeah, me neither. That type of insurance probably doesn't even exist. Just for fun, you would definitely check to see if all the insurance companies would be existed about providing that sort of protection for drivers who like getting into wrecks as much as possible.just in case you can't find anyone crazy enough to support your reckless hobby, just make a sign for the roof of your car, telling spectators that your insurance does cover what ever will happen to it.

Trick it out.
Now that you've done all the grunt work, it's time to have some fun. Ad cool racing stripes, murals that illustrate your manliness, a picture of Daffy Duck, or anything else that'll instill fear into competitors hearts. Artistically challenged? swing over to a local junk yard and pick up one of those lights that go on top of cop cars. Even is it isn't functional, your fellow derbymen will quake in their boots.