How Negativity Affects Your Relationship

There is something very real and very powerful about energy. Negative energy not only can single handedly destroy a marriage or relationship, but it can be damaging to your health too. Studies have shown that cancer cells can actually thrive and produce under stress and negative thought. That's pretty powerful!

I have been married for 21 years, and can honestly say I have done my share of nagging, complaining or at times harassing. I only wish I would have learned early on about the dangers of negative energy in a relationship or even my health. When one thinks of the word relationship, they instantly think of love, nurturing and closeness. If you are a negative person all the time, your partner will pick up on that along with everyone around you.

I was not aware that my negative attitude was taking a toll on my marriage until we almost headed to divorce court. I blamed him (another element to negativity) and felt that it could not possibly be me. My negativity was causing him silent stress, longer hours at work and more nights away from home and I was not even realizing that I was the one doing this to my relationship.

It didn't take long for me to start feeling the affects of negativity either. From fine lines on my face (most commonly known as frown lines) to intestinal problems. I found myself asking my husband, "Don't you love me still"? On a regular basis or, "What is wrong with you"? Also on a regular basis. This was not healthy for me or my marriage.

About 15 years into my marriage, I started having real serious health issues. Doctors had a difficult time diagnosing me and finally deemed it stress induced illnesses. Negativity was ruining my marriage, but it was also creating havoc with my health, and my husband's! I started taking natural herbs and supplements and playing around with feng shui, which utilizes proper placement of things in your life and in your home, along with positive energy. I was amazed at how well I felt all of a sudden and also how wonderful my marriage had become, it only took 15 years to be happy! Who knew?

Now my husband and I actually pay attention to our energy around us, keeping a positive attitude has saved our marriage. Removing the negativity from our relationship was the best possible solution to a rocky marriage. If feng shui is not your thing, try something else. A simple and quick solution to adding positive energy around you is by lighting aroma therapy candles, cut fresh flowers and green indoor plants strategically placed around the house.

Pay attention to how you respond to your partner, do you have a tone? Are you condescending with them? Stay aware and when you find yourself heading towards what I like to call the "be-witching hour", quickly turn your energy towards something positive like a beautiful vase of flowers, a picture on the wall that you love or just simply remember all the wonderful things you love about that special someone in your life. I make a real effort now to live this way and it has made a dramatic difference in not only my marriage, but my life as well.