How Old Are Your Friends?

After reading, "The Age of Friendship", I realized that the author touched on an important aspect of forming friendships. (http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/68474/the_age_of_friendship.html) Why should you limit friends to just your own age group? Choosing friends should be based on common interests and compatible personalities rather than on age. Sometimes you may choose a friend because he or she is a neighbor and you have that in common. You might select a friend from your church, health club, school organization, your workplace, your bowling league, your bridge club, or a neighborhood group: age differences shouldn't matter.

I live in a retirement community where the ages of the residents range from fifty-five to ninety years old. I have friends who are ten years older than I am, and some that are ten years younger than I am. With each friend, I share something special: going bowling, swimming, playing cards, shopping, or other activities. I am not especially close to these friends, but when we are together, we have a good time and value the time we spend with each other. All your friends don't have to be best buddies; they can be what I call occasional friends: you see them for a special occasion or activity and enjoy their company. In our clubs and activities, there are people of all ages who seek out others as friends. Age doesn't seem to matter.

My daughter, who is thirty, has a best friend who is forty-one. They share similar parenting standards, interests, and they can talk to each other about anything without fear of being judged. They help each other through life's everyday trials, share each other's happiness, and are there for each other if something awful happens. If these two women had confined their choice of friends to their own ages, they wouldn't have each other.

I am a freelance writer and sometimes perform work for another writer who has a lot of clients. She cannot do all the work herself, so she assigns projects to other writers. She is much younger than I am, maybe twenty years or so. We have become friends over the internet using email and instant messaging. She says she learns from my wisdom and experience, and I learn from her ambition and creative skills. We both admire each other's talents and personalities. We value the attributes we see in each other and appreciate each other. Freelance writing can sometimes be a lonely business and it's nice to have someone in the same line of work to communicate with, even if it's over the internet.

What would we do without friends? Everyone needs someone to talk to when they want to share an experience, an unpleasant event, a happy occasion, or just how they are feeling that day. We all want someone to pick us up when we are down, pat us on the back when we do well, comfort us when something bad happens, and just listen to us talk about our daily lives. That's what true friends do. Laughing and crying with our friends are some of the most extraordinary experiences in life. If we limit ourselves to friends our own age, we may be missing out on the enthusiasm of someone younger, or the wisdom and life experience of someone older.

If we can look beyond age and appreciate the true characteristics of those we meet, we might find a potential friend among them. How many times do you see (or work with) people each day and never talk to them? We may be missing great opportunities to form friendships. I have met people who say they don't have any friends. I ask them if they have looked for them. They tell me they don't know where to look, and I reply, "Just look around you everywhere you go". We have to make some effort to find good friends. It may mean talking to a lot of people before we find that person that "clicks" with us. When you find a person like that, value and nurture the friendship. Be glad that you can transcend age differences in your friendship and appreciate each other's wonderful qualities. Treasure your friendships, no matter what the ages of your friends are.