How to Get a Patent

Have you ever had an idea for an invention that would revolutionize the world, but no clue what to do with it? Well, for once, the federal government can help the little guy. If your invention qualifies, you can receive a utility patent from the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office (PTO) that will protect you from infringement by others for 20 years. During which time, presumably, you can market your new device and make a bloody fortune.

The Criteria

In the eyes of the PTO, patentable inventions must be: (1) useful, (2) novel, and (3) nonobvious. Utility patents (the most common) are issued or new processes, machines, simple products, combinations of things, and new uses for old inventions. Mere ideas, no matter how earthshaking, are not patentable; you must explain exactly how something can be made and used to get a patent. Sorry, philosophers.

Usefulness: Patent law says a candidate for a utility patent must be useful in some way, although the bar is pretty low.

After all, the PTO has issued patents for a motorized ice cream cone, a flatulence deodorizer, and even a Santa Claus detector. Is it any wonder people lose faith in government?

Novelty: Since 1790, the United States government has issued over 6.5 million utility patents. No matter how novel your idea may seem to you, somebody else probably has beaten you to it. Yet the way the law reads, novelty is a relatively easy requirement to satisfy. Any physical difference, no matter how trivial, meets the novelty test-even adding a doohickey onto somebody else's design.

Nonobviousness: Much harder to prove than usefulness and novelty is nonobviousness. In order for an invention to be nonobvious (read: clever), a hypothetical average inventor with perfect knowledge of the pre-existing technology would not find it an obvious invention. Your creation has to yield results that are either (1) new or (2) could not have been predicted. Hence, a cosmetic or minor functional difference, while satisfying novelty, won't cut the nonobvious mustard.