How to Be the Perfect Person

Much has been written about how to be the perfect wife and how to be the perfect husband. Religion is big, so there is obviously a market for becoming the perfect human.

Before I begin cashing in on this lucrative market, please read the following, seemingly unrelated, quotes:

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein

"There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle; you can live as if everything is a miracle."
- Albert Einstein

Of what can we be certain except this - that we are fertilized by mysterious circumstances? Where is man's truth to be found? Truth is not that which can be demonstrated by the air of logic. If orange trees are hardy and rich in fruit in this bit of soil and not that, then this bit of soil is what is truth for orange trees.If a particular religion, or culture, or scale of values, if one form of activity rather than another, brings self- fulfillment to a man, releases the prince within him unknown to himself, then that scale of values, that culture, that form of activity constitutes his truth. -Antoine de Saint-Exupery

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters, compared to what lies within us. - Emerson

Though the eye is small, the soul which sees through it is greater and vaster than all the things which it perceives. In fact, it is so great that it includes all objects, however large or numerous, within itself. For it is not so much that you are within the cosmos as that the cosmos is within you. - Meher Baba

This place where you are right now, God circled on a map for you. - Hafiz

I am you, only different. (A shirt design of mine).

Alright, now that you've read those quotes, let's get started:

Your mother was right when she said, "beauty is only skin deep." External perfection is not real, lasting perfection. If a person is beautiful, but not kind, her or his beauty is wasted. After those quotes, you didn't think that I'd be promoting false, external, superficial perfection did you? I'm only interested in the real deal.

To me, eternal perfection is spiritual perfection.

I do want to mention, though, that our external forms are perfectly miraculous. The human, cat, bird, sky, flowers, trees, bugs, quarks... all of creation is a miracle. Even without a vast knowledge of anatomy and physiology, and science in general, everything is a perfect miracle. Whether or not you believe in God like me, you've got give kudos to the master chef (who or what that may be).

What is spiritual perfection? To me it's selflessness, unconditional love, purity, truth, and sacrifice. Divine love, basically. Or the advertisement for divine love, depending on one's perspective.

I believe that spiritual perfection is here within each of us. It's latent. In some people it's so deep that it looks hopeless, but it's there. And there's others where it's flowing like crazy. The course of action is to reveal the perfection we already have. To water it. One way to get the ball rolling is acceptance of your fellow beings, assuming that you already accept yourself. "Loving" others, particularly the annoying co-worker (who is a total jerk, by the way), might be too much to ask for just yet. However, striving for basic acceptance is good. It helps to start relating to the other on a core level. You don't even need to send him an email, it's all done quietly within yourself.

Here's my favorite quote from Buddha on relating to other beings:

All beings tremble before violence. All fear death. All love life. See yourself in others. Then whom can you hurt? What harm can you do? - Buddha

Our lives are made up of a chain of experiences (duh), even the so-called mundane experiences, which help us clean the layers of ego dirt and reveal the eternal perfection within us. Did she just write, essentially, "Everything happens for a reason?" Yes, I did. I really don't like that expression, especially when that "everything" sucks! Nevertheless, there's no denying that the hardest time in my life, when my daughter was in the NICU after being born with a horrible birth defect, was not necessary for my growth and inner strength now. I really was a wimp before that.

Acceptance is another form of love, but it just seems easier to wrap our heads around. $99.00 a month looks easier than $1188.00 a year. It's the same, but different.

There's all kinds of love and everyone has it in some form or another. It might be selfish and base or quite altruistic and awesome, but it's there. It's not perfect love, but it has potential! The potential for a tree is in a little seed, young Skywalker. (Now I'm making up lines in movies that were not there but should have been there.) Water the love you have for your family, books, cars, hot babes, food, or whatever and expand and transform it as it flows. It simply takes intent. If you don't have the higher love you wish to have, pray for it. That sincere prayer alone will start a chain of events that will rock your world and your heart. And it's good!

A human being is a part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feeling as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty. - Albert Einstein

I think that the best information on expanding on your love is The Spectrum of Love by Alan Watts.

Here's an excerpt:

The essential point is to consider love as a spectrum. There is not, as it were just nice love and nasty love, spiritual love and material love, mature affection on the one hand and infatuation on the other. These are all forms of the same energy. And you have to take it and let it grow where you find it. When you find only one of these forms existing, if at least you will water it, the rest will blossom as well. But the effectual prerequisite from the beginning is to let it have its own way. - Alan Watts Read more

Here's some tips on revealing eternal perfection. I wrote them to myself, but sharing is good.

Be grateful.
Don't let petty things disturb me.
Be honest with myself and others.
Ask questions.
Look things up.
Don't have an agenda with others.
Remember the inner confidence.
Trust.
Don't let fear get in the way.
Be kind, rather than right.
Be neither be passive, nor aggressive.
Take a stand on inner truth and not have anything to prove.
Live simply.
Be natural.
Follow my heart.
Do nice things for others without any thought of what's in it for me.
Do nice things for others without any thought of what other people think my motives are.
Think for myself.
Walk the talk or don't talk.
Don't beat myself up if I fail to live up to my own list, but keep putting one foot in front of the other.

This list is not exhaustive.

So basically what have I said? Nothing that hasn't been said before; good thing I didn't charge you for this otherwise you'd want your money back.

Warning: If there is a hint of pride, that is not love or spirituality. If there is a hint of exclusiveness, as in "I'm saved and you're not," that is not spiritual. If there is any sign of false righteousness ("im-better-than-you-are-initis" - a horrible disease) jump off the nearest bridge, figuratively speaking that is.