How to Be a Pirate at the Office

Every workplace can have its characters! Some of them are nice to you; some might not be so friendly. Why don't you play the part of pirate and navigate through the stormy seas of the office, with an eye patch and a sword! Some of your shipmates may seem bossy and conniving while others will be more forthcoming. If you have joined a new office or ship, it is easier to set a pace with the workers so that they understand you and cause fewer problems for the voyage ahead. Even if you have worked at the same place for a number of years and dealt with the same mates over and over; there's still hope. Here are a few tips that will make you a pirate at the office so you can survive the cutthroat world of office politics.

Make Yourself First Mate:

Bosses might seem like they are beings from another planet, but it's really not that difficult to befriend them. Just put yourself in your boss's boots and you will realize that one thing they want more than anything - respect. Any good pirate knows it's all about respect. Just ask "Black Beard!" Make yourself the indispensible first mate and you're good to go. Remember you're just another pirate and not the ships captain, so act accordingly. Even if you are a high-achieving employee, no boss will tolerate rude or rash behavior. If they suspect you heading up a mutiny, you might be made to walk to plank.

Don't Go Overboard:

Befriending is not the same thing as taking your boss's kids to school! While being cooperative is the sign of a good pirate/employee, if you show complete lack of spine it might just back fire. Remember, pirates don't polish anyone's boots! So stand up for yourself when needed and explain politely if you need to refuse.

Know Thy Mates:

Not every person who comes to your desk with a donut and coffee is a good friend. So watch out for other pirates who always want to share their booty with you. Knowing what differentiates a good friend from a bad one might take a bit of experience but you can always keep that one un-patched eye out for those who are going out of their way to help you out. Consider what they might be trying to get in return? It might be many years on the same seas, so know your mates who are genuine and those who just want a back scratched in return.

Know Your Enemies:

If someone acts especially evil in front of you, take out your sword immediately! Cut their shirt at the chest and then pretend like what they did doesn't bother you at all. Ignorance is sometimes real bliss and confusion among ship mates can be divine. Remember, you are the pirate!