How to Make Your Relationship Last

All relationships have ups and downs. The key to having a great relationship is keeping the love alive. The obvious way to do that is to respect your partner and treat them well. However, there are many little things that we all do that bug our partner. They are insignificant in the moment, but over a lifetime, they can really add up to a big fat slap in the face of your relationship. This article will look at ways to make your relationship happy on a daily basis and therefore happy forever. If you cannot do these simple things for your partner, and they can't do them for you, it is time to rethink your relationship.

Tips for a Lasting Relationship: Finances

One person controls the finances and the other person respects them for it. Bottom line. You can switch off every few months or years if you want. Talk about your financial goals so you are working together. After paying your bills, doing the shopping, and saving, whatever is left gets split evenly. It doesn't matter who makes more money or who has more needs. You both need it equally to be happy. Set up a free checking account with a debit card for each of you. Split what is left over from each pay period and transfer it. I also transfer gas money to this account. This is your guilt free spending money. You can do whatever you want with it and so can your partner. The rule is you can never make the other person feel bad about it. It doesn't matter how many pairs of shoes she has or how many video games he has. This may seem simple, but money problems ruin marriages.

Tips for a Lasting Relationship: No Complaining

About your partner, that is. You should never, ever talk down your partner to anyone else. You should be their number one fan and advocate. Saying negative things about your partner is disrespectful, and only makes other people uncomfortable anyway. Some friendly teasing is fine, but even that should happen when your partner is with you.

Tips for a Lasting Relationship: No Nagging

In our house we have a no nagging rule. That doesn't mean we never bug each other, just that we have decided to respect each other enough to not nag. If your partner does something that drives you crazy, just ask them to stop. In our house, the standard line is "Hey sweetie, I don't want to nag, but can you please stop....." If you are subjected to a hey sweetie talk, you have to stop doing what is bothering the other person. If you want a lifetime together, this is something to get right early on. Do you really want to find out when you are old and gray that your partner has been resenting something stupid that you have been doing for decades?

Tips for a Lasting Relationship: Don't Dwell on the Physical

Don't dwell on your partner's physical appearance. You are both on a journey to the same destination, and it is not pretty. Comments about your partner's weight and looks should be supportive. Help each other to be healthy and happy. As your love grows, you will realize that true happiness is being together no matter what happens. If your partner has body issues, just tease them and tell them they are lucky they already snagged you, and now they don't have to worry about it anymore. Compliment your partner often on the things that you love about them.

Tips for a Lasting Relationship: Negotiate Chores

Sit down and negotiate the cores. Make a list of all of the chores that need to be done, and then take turns picking which ones you will each do. This way there is no nagging, and you can negotiate an equal work load. You each know what you have done and not done. It is equally obvious which chores your partner does and does not do. Realizing that, you never have to nag or fight about it. You don't touch each other's chores. You each have your areas of responsibility, and any consequences of not doing the chores are yours alone to deal with. That doesn't mean you can't offer a friendly reminder, but it should be reasonable. Try "My family is coming on Wednesday. Do you think you can have X, Y, Z done in time?" Occassionally help out your partner if company creates extra chores in their area, or if they are sick or extra busy. This is optional, so if you help your partner, you can't hold it over their head.

Tips for a Lasting Relationship: Stay in Touch

One way to a great relationship is to do little things to show each other that you care. This can be rubbing each other's shoulders while watching TV, serving a fresh cup of coffee in the morning, sending them a nice email, or calling them during the day to chat and see how their day is going. Help your partner do things that they are not good at, like typing for them, fixing things for them, etc. Buy them their favorite candy at the store. Just be thoughtful.

Tips for a Lasting Relationship: Don't Fall into Annoying Habits

Try not to fall into bad relationship habits. Shower and take care of yourself, even on your day off work. Don't be a slob. Don't start a conversation by yelling at your partner while they are in another room. Have good grooming habits, and don't share the bathroom (unless you are sharing the shower!) You want to be best friends, but you don't want to be buddies or roommates.

Tips for a Lasting Relationship: Keep the Spark Alive

One key to a great relationship is to be emotionally and sexually available to your partner. There should not be feelings of guilt or awkwardness in your physical relationship. Accept that your partner has needs and be open to meeting those needs. Express your needs as well, in an open and honest way. When you are in a real relationship, you want to have open communication. That doesn't mean that you have to always be in the mood, just that you should respect each other's needs and be able to talk about them.

These are a few relationship tips that I have learned over the years. While they seem obvious, I don't think that couples really think these things through when they are in a new relationship. It is only after many years that you think about the things that are really working in the long run. Have a happy relationship and enjoy your partner.