How I Saved Lenny Kravitz's Detroit Concert

Let me first tell you that I know where you can get a good GPS.

It just seems that with all the money you have earned singing songs like "American Woman" that you could afford on of these things. Your motor coach driver was up the street from the Riviera Theater, in a little cubby hole of a book and record store, and he was asking the owner, who looked suspiciously like George Harrison, how to get to Detroit. I guess you are playing there, starting Tuesday. I happen to get to Detroit fairly often, so I gave your driver the directions he needed.

Now, let me say this, Mr. Kravitz, I am a big supporter of your family. I was a big fan of your grandmother, Gladys Kravitz on that "Bewitched" show. I think she should have been the star of the show. Why was her nose any worse to twitch than Elizabeth Montgomery's? I don't think it's too late for a lawsuit here, but then again I'm no lawyer. I can see the family resemblance. Especially in the hair.

So Mr. Kravitz, you have me to thank for getting you to Detroit. As it so happens I am going to be in Detroit next week, and a few tickets to your concert will be sweet.

You can reach me care of AC here.

I really do think that the owner of the record shop was George Harrison, too. Why would your motor coach driver be in there if he wasn't? Just like the whole "Paul is Dead" thing? We all know Paul is not dead. He probably wishes he were dead for hooking up with that one legged babe one third his age, but live and learn. He is 64-plus now, and can't have all his right marbles. So George just decided he had had enough of the "star" life and bought the little record and book shop. Nothing wrong with that.

So, back to the tickets. I'd like the first couple of rows.

See what you can do. You owe me!

Meanwhile, if you give me your charge card number I will stop at Best Buy and pick up a GPS.

Also, I won't tell the "Guess Who" that you ripped off their "American Woman" song.

I won't, that is, if you come across with those tickets, thank you very much.

Your friend,

Rich in Chicago (Soon to be in Detroit)