How to Get Served Alcohol Without an ID

From reading the title of this piece, you may get the wrong idea. I don't condone underage drinking, nor do I buy drinks for underage people (boy, did I used to hate people like me). However, very occasionally you'll run into circumstances in which you can't produce identification; either you got a ticket and haven't gotten your license back, your wallet is stolen (and then, you REALLY need a drink), or for some reason you forgot to bring it when you left the house. Here is a method I've used in those circumstances to get alcohol-and I'll remind you, legally-with a little charm.

First of all, don't go up to the bar and demand a drink. If you ask for a drink and can't produce ID, it's over. If you sit at a bar long enough, talking to other patrons, the bartender's going to talk to you. Be patient.

Once he does talk to you, say that you're not drinking and explain why-truthfully, as long as it's believable. Sometimes, he'll offer you a drink right there. After all, you weren't asking for anything, and bartenders know that if you were underage, your eagerness would've gotten the best of you and you would have called them over.

Now, here's the charm part; you're going to strike up a conversation with the bartender. Start asking about sports teams, maybe, or music (this is a great one). Be sure to smile while talking to them, and validate what they're saying. "Oh, yeah, his new album's great. Did you like the third track?" etc. Be as specific as you can, and start mirroring what the bartender's doing. Try to breathe at the same speed and make some of the same body movements. Psychologically, this is a great tool; the more you seem like them, the better your chances. This is as close to the Jedi Mind Trick as you're ever going to get.

After a few minutes of this, start talking about alcohol; different shots or beers, and that sort of thing. Show a wide knowledge of your chosen subject if you've got it, but again, keep validating what the bartender says. If you disagree with him or her, don't be too adamant about it, but try not to appear like you're sucking up.
Now's your chance. When you both agree on a great beverage, say, "man, I could use one of those about right now." This is probably where the bartender's going to offer. If so, thank him and accept, but don't look too eager. Tell him or her you'll be here next week and you'll bring an ID to prove your age, or someone that can vouch for you. After the first drink, wait for an offer of a second (it'll happen, trust me) and after THAT point, you should be fine ordering for yourself.

If the bartender still hasn't offered, you're going to have a tough time. On the bright side, you've probably got him/her in your frame of mind now; when the conversation drifts off, let it, and then work on someone else at the bar. Tell your story and get them to order a drink; 99% of the time, the bartender's going to let this slide and you're golden. After all, they didn't sell it to you, and they love money as much as the rest of us.

Okay, one more disclaimer; this stuff's not likely to work if you're underage (hate to say it, but there's a gleam in the underage eye that is unmistakable to bartenders), and if you are served while under 21 you can get into big trouble, as can the nice man who was serving you all night. Also, if you're drinking without an ID, stay sober enough to not make a jerk of yourself, or you can say goodbye to that bar for all of time, and they might get nasty with you. As in any case where alcohol's involved, drink in moderation, and of course, never drive. After all, you don't even have your license!