How to Set Financial Goals with Your Fiance

The article "What Are the Top Marriage-Destroying Financial Problems?" states that "it is said that couples fight about money more than they ever fight about sex or any other topic." and as the article "Money and Marriage: How to Ensure Matrimony is a Financial Match Made in Heaven" puts it "The time to nip such arguments in the bud say experts is BEFORE couples walk down the aisle." After becoming engaged, one of the first things that you and your fiancee should do is to sit down and set financial goals together. This does not just mean the kind of talks that you have had up until now, such as "I want a bunch of kids and a house with a white picket fence" that many couples dream over together. You need to figure out a tentative plan for your finances now and in the future.Here are the top 3 hardest money questions to ask (and answer) before you get married.

1.) How Much Are You Both Worth (Financially Speaking That Is)?
The article "Preparing Your Money for Marriage" puts it best when it uses this example "if you have $25,000 in savings and your fiance has $25,000 in debt, you'll probably write a check to pay off her debt when you get married." Even if small matters have come up before, getting down to the nitty-gritty of your assets, separately and together, is a must before you legally become one person. Print out your credit reports (you can do this for free, once a year, through all three major reporting agencies) and sit down and discuss honestly any debt, savings or investments that you each have. If necessary speak to a financial adviser.

2.) Should We Have a Prenuptial Agreement?
This is one of the most controversial topics when it comes to money and marriage, as shown in, "Marriage and Money: It's Ours, Not Yours and Mine." The debate rages on as to where this legal document is something that should only be seen as a prerequisite to a lack of commitment or a true protection of yourself and future heirs. Either way, if you are considering this avenue, read "Money and Marriage: Do I Need a Prenuptial Agreement?" and "Money and Marriage: Considering the Pre-nuptial Agreement" to find out more about the legalities of it all.

3.) Is One of Us Going to Be the Sole Breadwinner?
Setting financial goals with your fiance means also discussing career futures. This entails, among other things, who's career is going to come first in the long run? What kind of criteria will we have to decide the answer if one of us gets a promotion, causing the end of the other's job because of relocation? What about when we have children? All of these questions need to asked and answered before getting married. Read "Marriage and Finances: Stay at Home Spouse" for more information about conflict resolution if one of you decides to be a stay at home spouse or parent.

By asking (and answering) these top 3 hardest money questions for before you get married, it will lead onto the other ways to set financial goals with your finance. Even the little things matter, since small arguments like in the article "Why You Should Talk About Money Before Marriage" of "Why did you buy this JIF peanut butter when Our Family would have been fine?" can lead to bigger things.