How to Sex Pro Cheerleaders

I think to sex pro cheerleaders must be the second biggest fantasy for guys right after the Playboy bunny. (We'll do an article on that later, because I know one! She gave me the goods.) But hey, pro cheerleaders are just women, too. And a lot of them aren't even that hot. Anyway, you just want bragging rights. Here's how to sex pro cheerleaders.

Things You'll Need:

• City bar guide

• Lots of testosterone

• A few bucks

1. FIND THE SPOT. You can't sex pro cheerleaders if you can't FIND pro cheerleaders. Now where would pro cheerleaders be? That's right; with the TEAM. Now most big football and baseball towns have jaunts that are well known for being the spots that the players hang out in. In LA, for example, one place is called the Short Stop. It's right by Dodger Stadium. Lots of pro players and pro cheerleaders go there. so hit up CityGuide and Yelp. Those who have been lucky enough to hang with players are sure to share that experience online.

2. DON'T GO AFTER GAMES. If you want your best chance at a pro cheerleader, you probably shouldn't go to the spot right after an entire busload of guys who are bigger than you just got done revving up their testosterone to the max. Wait for an off day, or better yet, the offseason. Players and cheerleaders will go to the same places, and the cheerleaders will have their guard down more. That's when you make your approach. Of course, if you're Al Bundy and you scored 4 touchdowns in one game, by all means, hit the drinking hole after a game. And GL2U!!

3. APPROACH STYLISH. You better have your threads TOGETHER if you want to sex pro cheerleaders. All name brand. Shoes polished. To sex pro cheerleaders means that you have your exciting little corner of the world that she hasn't seen yet. But you're gonna show her. First impressions are EVERYTHING.

4. BE EXCITING. To a pro cheerleader infused into the world of glamour, large hulking dudes, and all day parties, you're a nobody. Got that? BUT! This actually gives you the advantage. You can not at any point let her know that you know she's a "somebody." Treat her like a regular girl. If she says she's a pro cheerleader, acknowledge, then brush it off. She'll either be highly confused or turned on because you're not gawking like most guys would. But you'd better have a date planned. Grab her hand, and lead her to excitement. That's a whole nutha article. And hey, this is your chance to be that doctor you've always wanted to be. Don't worry; she's not actually LISTENING. You're painting a picture. An exciting picture. Don't let a little thing like your lack of an education get in the way. You're in the big leagues now. You're gonna sex pro cheerleaders, baby!!

5. CLOSE. Once you introduce yourself and you get her out of her comfort zone and take her to yours, and you're super exciting, she's not a pro cheerleader any more. She's just a girl who got swept off her feet. Now you can make the moves you'd make on any normal girl. Make sure to get the camera without the red light...they know all about those.