How to Get a Shy Guy to Open Up

We don't always get what's on our wish list, remember Christmas 1984? Was that Easy Bake oven under the tree or the entire G.I. Joe crew? For some of us, not getting what we want is something we're used to; so why should it be any different when it comes to dating? Well, for one, in dating, you don't always knows what you're getting in the person until much later--in some cases, you know, after you've dated a while and the butterflies start to settle. When dating, we sometimes need to allow the qualities we want in a person to blossom and flourish and not be so quick to judge. And that's especially true when it comes to a shyness. And how do you get a shy guy to open up? Here are three tips to help you out.

1. Go where he goes. Is he pretty quiet around you and your friends? It may not be that he's not into you, but just not interested in the activity--but he's present, he came along for the ride, so he's a trooper and deserves credit. The next time you plan a date or a get together, go some place he enjoys. Try involving yourself in an activity he's passionate about where he can show off his skill. Is it the batting cage? In the kitchen? Maybe it's even at the hardware store, who says those trips can't be sexy? There's a sensual element at play, when you see the man you're attracted to telling you about his interests and in his element--work that to your advantage and you'll see him open up...maybe even kiss you and his shyness goodbye.

2. Compliment him. Guys like to be complimented too. We just like it in other areas as opposed to our clothes, hair and nails (some of us). Was that a sexy kiss? Tell him. Did opening your door deserve a thank you? Say so. We might not like to admit it, but a compliment goes a long way and it's all about the reward, right? This quickly establishes a comfort level and makes it easier to open up. Showing kindness through a compliment will make your shy guy feel at ease and who knows--you might have just opened up a can of "conversation".

3. Ask, ask and then ask some more. I think it's safe to say women are smarter than men. So you will have to be a bit sly when on dates with Mr. Shy Guy. Avoid asking "yes" or "no" questions but go with an open-ended one instead. "What do you like about your job" makes far better conversation than, "So, you're a banker, right?" Not only do open-ended questions make your date feel like you're truly interested in them by probing, but it''ll save you the frustration of feeling like you're interviewing him instead of enjoying the moment. Hopefully, he'll pick up on the cues and your little chatter box will flourish right before your eyes.