How Do You Socialize Homeschooled Children?

When talking to people about homeschooling our children, it seems their biggest concern is how to socialize homeschooled children. People listen anxiously to me extol the virtues of home school, finally bursting in with "But what about socialization? Your homeschooled children won't be socialized the way kids in public school are!"

"I know," I exclaim with a big smile. That's the best part!" Most families I've talked with agree that they don't want their homeschooled children socialzed so as to develop peer dependencies, me-first attitudes, and lack of concern for their own families. Not only have parents observed these behaviors in children who are too often with peers instead of family, but it is documented in studies such as one involving Stanford, University of Colorado Medical School, Michigan State, and Hewitt investigative teams.

They analyzed more than seven thousand early childhood studies. (Moore, 1982). They discovered that children need to spend time with parents extensively to learn the values and internalize the character traits that produce good citizens. If they spend too much time with peers they become dependent on them, and adapt to their immature value systems. Apparently that has been the case for a long time. "I believe that school makes complete fools of our young men, because they see and hear nothing of ordinary life there" said Satyricon long ago. (Quotes on homeschooling and education. (2002)

However, children who spend a great deal of time with their parents learn to understand why their parents want them to be responsible, trustworthy, kind, and compassionate. Home school parents consistently report that their children are well-behaved, disciplined, kind to younger siblings, and poised with people of all ages.

Studies such as Dr. Johnson (1991), Dr. Taylor (1986), Dr. Shyers (1992) and Dr. Montgomery (1989), as well as Drs. Paulo de Oliveira, Timothy Watson, and Joe Sutton (n.d.), bear them out, having researched self-esteem, social & community interaction, behavior problems, social and emotional adjustments, critical thinking skills, academic preparedness and achievement in college, and adult lives of home schooled children, and found all to be equal or better than public school children. (NHERI, 2002).

This really is common sense, since home schooled children deal with parents, younger and older siblings, elderly friends and neighbors, and even repairmen and friends of their parents on a regular basis. They spend their days in a secure environment, and can be guided as situations arise, thereby gradually learning proper ways of behaving and the benefits thereof.

One of the most delightful things parents discover when they decide to home school is that their fears of sitting home alone day after day by themselves is as far from the true picture as they can get. The truth is, homeschoolers tend to band together, vastly enlarging the opportunities available to each family. The Florida Parent-Educator Association convention in Orlando attracted 10,000 conventioneers taking in three days of 100 workshops, 131 booths selling curricula and software, graduation ceremonies for high-school seniors and even a college scholarship to Harvard. (Schafly, 2002).

That's only once a year, but more and more families are joining support groups, such as the one our family belongs to off and on. Our group, Christian Home Educators of Southwest Florida, offers such benefits as "a monthly newsletter, planned field trips, yearbook, commencement, specialized training seminars, orientation to Florida home schooling laws, sports association (won first place in girls state basketball tournament, 2002), cooperatives, fellowship and encouragement, message line, spelling bee, history and science fairs, Envirothon teams, youth council, high school banquet, etc." (CHESF, 2002). That "etc." stands for a lot of additional activities, by the way. My son particularly enjoyed the monthly ice-skating trips, and we had field trips to places such as news and radio stations, parks, businesses, beaches, museums, and nature centers every week in small groups. All of this for only $20.00 per year, per family.

The yearbook staff is mostly high school students, and there are many opportunities for drama, art, music and the Presidential Fitness Challenge park days. Most homeschoolers also take advantage of 4-H, boy and girl scouts, sports leagues, music lessons, and volunteering, and many more are heavily involved in church activities.

Home schooling continues to grow at a rate of 7% to 15% per year (Ray, 2002) as more and more families realize that home school is the best way to instill values in their children, socialize them properly, and provide them with an excellent education. As nearly anyone will tell you who is enjoying the benefits of an adult chiild who was homeschooled, homeschooling your children is truly one of those situations where you reap what you sow, and homeschooled children are socialzed quite nicely. So how do you socialize homeschooled children? By homeschooling them, of course!

References

Christian Home Educators of Southwest Florida (CHESF), 2002 Newsletter

Facts on homeschooling. (2002). Retrieved February 6, 2003 from the National Home Education Research Institute's Web site: http://www.nheri.org/

Moore, R. & D. (1982). Home-spun schools. Berrien Springs, MI: Hewitt Research Foundation.

Quotes on homeschooling and education. (2002). Retrieved on February 9, 2003, from National Home Education Network's Web site:http://nhen.org/media/default.asp?id=357

Schlafly, P. (2002, June 4). Home schooling has come a long way. Townhall.com Columnists. Retrieved February 7, 2003 from http://www.townhall.com/columnists/phyllisschlafly/ps20020604.shtml