How to Spot a Great Guy in the Personals

Ok, you are ready to meet someone and you are considering online dating. Maybe you have already signed on for a site.
How do you find a good guy and how do you know when you have found one?. What a man writes in his personals ad can be very revealing and if you know what to look for they help you pick the exact type of man you are seeking. Here are some tips that will help you "break the code" and understand how to spot a good guy.

The first thing that will help you is setting your search criteria. Being honest with yourself will save you time. For example, if you know that you would really not have a relationship with someone of another faith, a man who does not want children or someone who makes less money than you do, set your choices to exclude them.. Once you can get a clear picture in your mind of the type of man ( including his lifestyle, beliefs, income and looks) you are seeking it is time to begin reading ads.

The first thing that is important to note is whether the person is a paying member or using a free trial. If you are particularly drawn to an ad and the person states thier free membership is about to runout. take note. You can save thier ad and go back later to check if they re-joined as a paying memeber. What people will spend money on ..and how much they will spend reveals how important that thing is to the person. Do you really want to start something who thinks about twenty dollars a month is too much to invest in a relationship.?Chances are they won't invest too heavily in whomever they do find.

The second thing I consider is how much effort the person put in to the add. Each question does not merit a thousand word answer. Watch out for those who go on forever. However, you also want to avoid one or two words answers or people who respond "I'll tell you later" to alot of the questions. If writing a personal ad is too much effort, how much do they want to make a meaningful connection.? Look for things like "just looking" or "here for fun" unless you want a very casual relationship. Pay particular attention to any choices that ask "what type of relationship do yu seek". If you want a long term relationship..look for others who do as well. If his selection says .he is seeking .a date..an activity pal..or a romantic interlude, believe him that is what he is looking for, nothing more.

Next, avoid men who use alot of sexualized language or who are sexually overt. Consider the person's screen name. It says alot about them. A man who uses his name or occupation in thier screenname is a better bet than who name themselves "sexy dude 32."

This may sound obvious but pay attention to what a man says about himself, things like , "I am reliable. I am honest". Look for someone who will not shy away from saying some good things about themselves. If a man's ad is a list of twenty attributes you must live up to, I'd say save yourself some time. If the point of a man's ad is a very soecific search for just one type of woman, for example:tall woman sought, do nt bother to read further unless you are that type.

Lastly pay attention to how you feel as you read thier ad. Did they make you laugh? Do they sound sarcastic, bitter or down on women in general? Most people sound alot like what they write in thier ad,. If the tone of thier ad does not appeal to you, you probably would not hit it off in person. Look for someone who sounds positive and kind. Niceness counts even in a personal ad. Dd they use thier ad space to complain about an ex? This is a big red flag that should have you hitting the button that says , "next" ! Ignore any ads that upset you or that offends you. Never respond to them. Life is short and we are all entitled to our opinions. Go on to the next ad and focus on finding someone who closely matches you in belifs and interests..

Of course, all of these tips can be used when reading responses that are sent to you. Look for someone who makes some effort, seems pleasant and is not too flirty. I pay more attention to a person who takes the time to write an email than someone who sends one of those compuetr generated responses. It may say, "hey I like your ad" but what it means is all I had to do was press this button. I'm not saying to ignore a computer greeting, just wait and see if he is a man of few words in future correspondence. The man is hoping to convince you to meet him with his words. Does he engage in a conversation or does he respond with one line responses? Does he ignore questions you ask? Look for someone who will take the time to send a thoughtful reponse.

A man's personal ad is a reflection of what he wants, and how much he is willing to do to get it. It also gives you some idea on his outlook on life. His screen name may be particularly revealing. I hope this information gets you one step closer to finding the guy you seek..