If you want your own lens into your child's "other live," the first step is to know who his or her friends are. Getting ahold of you child's cellphone would be key. Watching where it is laid while your son or daughter is in the shower would be ideal. If this isn't an option, then take it in for "service." Finding out who your child calls the most, text messages the most, and what he/she is saying might open your eyes quite a bit. There is also the Cell Phone Spy Data Extractor that will allow you to read deleted text messages and other information.
Pre-teens and teens using Instant Messaging and chat-rooms has been common place for over a decade now. Using spy software like PC Spy Monitor XP 3.0 will let you tap into this hidden wealth of your child's secret live. If you gain your child's passwords to his/her social network site (i.e Facebook, Myspace) you can see not only what your child is up to, but what his or her peers and friends are doing. Even if you can't get their password, browsing the friends list (which is possible without an account on both website) can give you a better insight.
Often times while hanging out and up to no good, I counted on my parents punctuality. Say for instance that I was suppose to be picked up at a certain time. If my mother came just minutes early then I was toast. Showing up early, or unexpectedly will let you see things your child doesn't want you to. I suggest that you don't make yourself apparent so you are sure to see the whole thing.
Kids are clever now. There's no telling how much thought I would put into doing something that I knew was wrong just so I wouldn't get caught. If your child his hiding something, he/she will be sure not to let you find it. Under the mattress is to easy. Think taped under a dresser drawer or inside the box-spring. Also, if your son or daughter suddenly takes an interest in burning candles or excessive body spray then be weary; because chances are some unwanted smell is being covered up.
I say all that, to say this: my parents kept very little tabs on me. I watched what I wanted, listened to what I wanted, and hung around who I wanted. Ultimately, spying on your child will only make you feel better, but will probably just lead to more trouble. The decisions are up to them. You can guide; you can encourage, but at the end of the day you can only hope and pray. I'm one of the examples that made the right choices, but I've seen many in my shoes who made the wrong one.
If you decide to spy on your child; do it with the knowledge that it can leave a strain in your relationship. If you get caught, he/she will be hard strung to trust you again. Trust is needed when your son or daughter gets into real trouble. Even if you don't get caught, some things are best unknown. Ignorance is bliss.
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