How to Survive a Breakup

We all had a relationship that we convinced ourselves was special, and would withstand the test of time. We also had hoped that this person was "the one". Then one day out of the blue that so called special person brings the hammer down on you and tells you they want out of the relationship. All of a sudden that element of surprise in your life is all to real. First your in disbelief and very confused. Now what? You try to convince them to stay, however, this is very wrong indeed. If someone wants out, then just let them go and wish them well. As hard as that my be. In the long run it is the best thing for both of you.

Many people want to find someone new STAT. I feel this is dangerous and could lead to trouble in the long run. Because you want that special relationship so bad all your best judgment and logic flies out the window. Just being with somebody because you are on the rebound or lonely is a big injustice to you and the other person involved.

First you need to grieve the loss just like any other loss in your life. I know this is difficult, but absolutely necessary to fully recover and move on. The grieving process takes time, and the longer the relationship lasted the longer the grieving process.

However, the time frame for grieving is tricky. You need time to feel sad and mourn the loss, but grieving for to long a time and dwelling on the memories, can lead to depression. If that happens then you have two problems to recover from.

There are things you can do to help with the process, and maybe move things along quicker. Also, in my opinion, when you're hanging on to the past you close yourself off from anyone else coming into your life. Then you may miss the opportunity of finding somebody wonderful or maybe that "soul mate" that everyone is looking for today. Do you think there is such a thing? ( I do ) Then again that is another article.

Here are 10 things you can do to help:

Take on a new hobby
This will keep your mind occupied, and your hands busy.

Get lost in a good book
If you like sci-fi this can take you away to some other place and time, and you can get lost in your thoughts for that moment. Or any genre that interest you, ( I would steer clear of the Romance novels for a while.)

Go back to school, learn a new skill
Learning something new will make you feel more confident about yourself.

Go out with friends
Go to the movies or out to dinner, maybe even take some dance lessons.

Join a Gym
Not only will you get in shape but you will also meet new people and make new friends.

Join a Club
Someplace you can go weekly or monthly and discuss topics you have a passion for, this will give you something to look forward too and take your mind off any problems you might have.

Take up gardening
Planting a flower garden or vegetable garden and taking care of it will keep you busy. Flowers are uplifting, and will make your home look attractive. Eating vegetables from your own garden, is much tastier then store bought.

Meditate or take a yoga class
When you meditate you get into a relaxed state of mind, which always make you feel good. Yoga will put you in that same frame of mind, and also make your body limber.

Volunteer
Volunteer at a senior home or animal shelter or anything else you would like doing. Not only will you be helping yourself but you will be helping others also.

Write in your journal
Sometimes getting things off your chest makes you feel much better, then you can eventually let go of those bad feeling.

Doing some or all of these things for a few months should certainly make you feel better. Then you can dig deep down inside yourself and realize that if this happened then this was best for both of you. Remember, people come in and out of our lives so that we can learn certain lessons and grow as a person.