How to Survive Your Child's Sleepover

Rules, Rules and a Few Giggles Can Get it Done

Nora Beane
For parents, surviving your son or daughter's sleepover really is as important as having the event be a rip-roaring success. Of course you want the best of times for your children and the children they call their friends, but there really is no need for a sleepover to also be the worst of times for you, the hard working host or hostess of this overnight get together. The formula for how to survive your child's sleepover really is a combination of rules, rules and a few giggles. Having marched through sleepovers with three kids of my own, I can say its a formula that generally works.

The first set of rules are those you set with your own child. Any child wanting to have a sleepover knows that its important to keep Mom and Dad happy before the event begins. And so most children will show some willingness to sit down, if you can catch them long enough, to discuss a few ground rules for the sleepover. It's important to realize that the attention span of a child preparing for a sleepover is likely to be limited so make the rules few and simple.

My standards were always quite basic. First no one goes out of the house for any reason ever. Second this is a sleepover which means in this house people will in fact sleep and here is the lights out hour and the final call for bathroom use, drinks of water etc. ( the time changed as my kids aged). Third help me to move the following things out of the common room you will be using for your sleepover. Finally understand that we need to work together to make this a good time for everyone, so you need to work with me to keep the rules in place.

The second set of rules are those you share with children who are guests at your child's sleep over. Again you need to keep in mind the fact that kids coming to a sleepover are just as excited about the event as your child is. You don't want to put a giant wet blanket over the proceedings. Still talking to everyone before they get too wound up or settled remains the best time to set the ground rules.

Repeat the first two rules you shared with your own children. Impress on the guests the fact that unless there is a major emergency, no one should leave the house for any reason. Also state with authority that there will be lights out and a final call for bathroom and kitchen trips. Then add that while they are in your house you are playing the part of their parents. That means not only that you will enforce the first two rules but also that you are there for anyone who is lonely, homesick, or physically sick.

Adding that you know they will be helpful and respectful can be a nice touch that at the same time sends a message.

While your children may initially be a bit miffed at the laying down of the law, underneath their attitude they will be just a little bit glad that you gave out the rules rather than leaving it to them. If and when they have to fulfill their part of enforcing the rules, they will have the fall back of being able to blame it all on you, which is quite all right as long as the rules hold.

Now what about the giggles? Once the rules are set you have to do something extremely difficult. Step back and let the fun begin. Stay on the apron of activity. Give your child as much private space as your home allows to enjoy the company of his or her friends. If you need to help with a game or serve refreshments, be as inconspicuous as possible, let the kids be kids and have as many giggles as they can within the framework you have set.

You can survive your child's sleepover. You just need to work on the details of a fine balancing act between rules and giggles. Don't worry your kids will let you know how you did.

Published by Nora Beane

I am a former high school history teacher and Director of Religious Education with a total of 27 years of active experience as teacher and administrator. I am now a semi retired freelance writer. I have two...  View profile

  • You can survive your child's sleepover
  • Set a few reasonable safety rules with your child and with guests
  • Then be as inconspicuous as possible so the giggles can begin

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