How to Talk to Strangers in Business

We as children were all taught to never talk to strangers. Some of us in our adulthood still have those fears in talking to people we have never met. It is important to note that those fears are totally programmable in that they can easily be reversed by actually conquering them. Somewhere along the line either as a child or teenager, you were programmed to never talk to strangers because of not knowing who they are or what they have done. It is understandable for parents to protect their children from people they don't know, but that way of thinking is programmed into their heads for doing so.

Most of us that work with consumers and the public have to deal with people they have never seen or talked to before. But those same people still have fears of talking with others they don't know because of what they were taught and programmed to do as young children. I know in the business I am an owner in, you cannot be fearful of talking to anyone which includes strangers or people you don't know. This is a hard process because like almost of all of us, I had a fear at a young age of talking to those I didn't know. Over time, I have progressively gotten better because of taking action to overcome that fear. Remember, action does cure all fears.

The very first thing you have to remember in meeting someone for the first time is how you approach them. Always put a smile on your face when meeting someone or a group of people. The reason being is because most of the time, people that you come in contact with will mirror your attitude. So if you look like you are in a bad mood and are wondering why others around you are as well, it is likely because they are mirroring you. So if you think that someone is in a bad mood, this will make you less likely to want to start a conversation with them. Be sure that you smile because you would be surprised at how many that don't do that while trying to talk to someone.

After your approach, then you ask the person how they are doing today or something related to it. If you show the person that you are in a good mood, most will respond in the same form by asking you back. In our crazy and hectic world that we live in, most people don't take much time to care or ask how someone is doing or feeling. If you start a conversation that way, you stand a good chance in being able to carry on with it as well as overcoming the fear of it.

Another key to overcoming a fear of talking to others is being able to relate to a subject that you think the stranger may know something about. For example, when I go out to talk to people about my business and what we do, I can easily strike up a conversation about the college or pro sports teams that the person has on the shirt he/she is wearing. I will start out talking about some of the players and games of the team he has on his shirt. Then it slowly progresses into great conversation about sports. Then after I am calm after starting a conversation, we can talk about other things including business. So for those of you out there, like entry level salesman, this is a good thing to remember as this is a great way to not only ease your way into talking to someone, but the stranger will likely be more relaxed as well.

Let's face it, the best topic in a conversation is people talking about themselves. So if you see someone wearing a shirt with something on it that you can relate to, then talk with them about that. This also includes if you see a watch, jewelry, tattoo, or anything significant to strike up a conversation. Since I am a huge sports fan, I can relate to anyone that is wearing sports attire. It is different for everyone, so find out what you know alot about and use that to your advantage when you notice someone that may have have a simular interest as you.

One of the best conversations I had with someone that I have never met took place when I was going through some DVD's at a local retailer last week. I asked him how he was doing, then we started talking about some of the latest DVD releases. Come to find out after being able to start the conversation about DVD's, he had just gotten honorably discharged out of the Army and was on his way to Seattle, Washington the next day. So being that both of my parents served proudly in the Air Force when I was child, I could relate to all of the moving that goes along with being in a military family. After that, I started talking with him about the business I am in. He was a nice guy, and that helped. But my approach, attitude, and being able to start a conversation about something we were both familar with was the key in being able to carry on with it.

Sometime either at the beginning or end of the conversation, it is a good idea to shake the other's hand. This shows common and mutual respect to that person, and it helps to ease them. Personally, I wait until the end of the conversation to do so.

It is important to know that not everyone will be wanting to carry on a conversation. It is not a knock on you necessarily, but it is totally unrealistic to think that everyone that you talk to will openly carry on a conversation. When I talk to someone that seems like he is in rush to get somewhere or doesn't want to get in a conversation, I will just tell the person, "Have a nice day, and take care". Simply put, you move on from that and continue to maintain the right approach with everyone else you talk with.

So the approach, overall attitude, and topic of conversation are things that will help you overcome the fear of talking to new people. This applies not only in business, but in our personal lives, too. The only true way to overcome any fear is to take action. Action cures all fear, and you will be able to overcome anything by just doing that.