How to Teach Your Children the Real Meaning of Holidays

This morning when I took my son down to wait for the bus, I saw that what I had dreaded since Thanksgiving had begun to unfold: the commercialization of Christmas. Thanksgiving and Halloween were bad enough. The halls here looked like the holiday section of Walmart. In fact, there were so many things making noise at the end of the hall that we actually had to turn them off in the morning. Sorry, that's just too much plastic and stimulation for me in the wee hours of the morning.

But, it does serve a purpose. It made me think about what I want my son to know about the holidays and how he would get that information. It also brought back a fond Christmas memory. I was babysitting a little boy who was about 4. Across the street was a blow up reindeer and Santa atrocity. The little boy asked me about the star on my tree and after listening, seemed confused. He wanted to know what Santa was all about if this holiday was really about the birth of Christ (yes, I am aware that it was originally a pagan holiday, but really, the boy was 4). Not knowing what to say or do because I wasn't his parent, I finally told him that Santa kind of worked for God. His job was to distribute presents. Today I wonder, is that what I would want my son to learn? So I came up with some ways that we could help our children to understand what we believe the holidays are about-any time of the year, no matter the religion.

Figure out what the holiday means for you. Do you know what you're celebrating and why or are you just carrying on without knowing what they really mean? You might want to clarify your own beliefs before trying to share them with your children. Rest assured, they will ask questions!

Explain decorations. Personally I'm not a big fan of overkill on the decorations. My neighbors down the hall would wrap the building in wrapping paper with a big bow for Christmas, then position a multitude of blow up movie characters dressed in red on the front lawn if they had their way. That's just not me. I want my decorations to have some sort of meaning. Parents can explain why they are putting specific decorations up and what they represent about the holiday, if anything. This also helps us to keep our focus on the holiday and not on competing with the rest of the town for the highest light bill.

Tell stories about your own childhood. Children love to hear about their parents' lives as children. Share some of your memories that really brought the holiday home for you.

Discuss your religious beliefs. I've seen children get punished because they were confused about religion. That's very upsetting when you think about it. If you've been raised a certain way, then by the time you are a parent you might have it all figured out. But, you are probably going to have your own questions. Have patience with your children as they try to make their way in a world with a variety of beliefs hitting them from every angle.

Create your own symbols. Most holidays are built around some type of spiritual belief. Part of all spiritual beliefs have to do with self and loved ones. Why not have some fun with your children and create some symbols to represent your own family unity and maybe each person in the family?

I'm combatting commercialism this year, as I would think many parents are. My son is starting to ask his own questions, like what does the fat guy sitting in the plastic beach chair at the end of the hall have to do with Christmas? Think about what you have to deal with on any given holiday and be prepared to help your children to have faith in the values that you want to set for them.