How to Tell If a Woman is Being Abused

There are many women who are being abused by either their husband or boyfriend. In many cases it is very hard to tell because confronting the woman causes a great deal of stress on both the person who is concerned and the woman who may be being abused. Understanding the cycle of abuse, and how an abusive man treats a woman can guide you if you want to know how to tell if a woman is being abused.

At the onset of dating abusive and controlling men will be extremely attentive and affectionate. But once they are sure that they have won the woman over all that is out the window. Their true self rises to the surface. Sure everyone thinks he's such a nice guy because he has manipulated them also.

Abuse is about control, and when the relationship reaches a point where the abuser feels secure he will begin to do whatever it takes to meet his needs. Some tactics used are keeping the woman at home, controlling what she wears, and separating her from her friends and family. These are all threats to him.

Woman tend to rationalize his behavior with their emotions; he loves me so much he doesn't want me to work, he's so jealous he doesn't want me to wear short skirts anymore, he gets angry if I'm not home when he gets home because he thinks someone else is going to steal me away, etc. Because he was so affectionate and kind initially she believes he loves her, and justifies the abuse.

The first time she is abused the abuser will even resort to tears if they have to, they will blame their childhood, and even the woman they have abused for their actions; in a lot of cases the woman forgives because she is a lot more compassionate, and the cycle of violence begins.

If you are worried about a woman being abused ask yourself a few questions. Is she acting out of character? Has she quit her job, or told you how much her man loves her because he never wants her to work? Does she style her hair differently? Has she stopped wearing make-up? What about her clothing has she started dressing more conservative? Does she act differently when he is around?

Changes in the man who is abusive, although, his behavior towards you might seem the same, can be identified if you pay attention to how he talks to and treats the woman. Does he cut her off, or finish her sentences when she is speaking? If family or friends visit is he always present? If they attend gatherings such as dinners or cook-outs is he always in close range. If she is on the telephone does he ask who she is talking to?

Too many people look for the black-eye covered with make up, or the long sleeve blouse in the middle of summer because these are definite signs of abuse, however, many abusive men will resort to abuse that does not show outwardly. They will pull hair, kick or punch in the head and stomach; they do things that will not leave evidence that can easily be identified. Remember, they are manipulative and controlling.

Sadly, if you think a woman may be in an abusive relationship chances are that you are right. Domestic abuse laws have become stricter, but abuse is still a serious problem.

The safest way to reach out or help a woman you think is being abused is to get some advice from a professional on how to handle the situation. Accusing the abuser will probably backfire. And trying to talk to the woman, who is usually ashamed, may cause her to push you away altogether. How to tell if a woman is being abused is not always easy, but once you suspect it be careful how you approach the situation when trying to help.