How to Be a Wedding Reception Coordinator for the Day

Your best friend is getting married in a month and she realizes that she does not have anyone to orchestrate her wedding reception. She turns to the only person she trusts - - you! Of course, you have helped her plan the wedding from the very beginning. You know what she wants! However, your only experience of running a reception is your own wedding! Overwhelmed? Here are the simple steps on how to coordinate a successful wedding reception.

The first step, and the most important step, is the communication between your friend, the bride, and you. Schedule coffee with her, sit down, and discuss exactly what she wants. Be sure to put all details down on paper! Write down all vendors and numbers. Ask her where, in the process, is she with each of her vendors. Did she call and give a final guests count to her caterer? When does the caterer need a final count, signed contract, and final payment? Did she finalize all the details with all her vendors? (i.e. church, florist, caterer, entertainment, and photographer, etc.) Ask her what has been done, what still needs to be finalized, and what she expects you to do. Does she want you there on the day to help and oversee the set up of her reception? Does she still need to put the favors together? Does she want you to drop off the favors, champagne glasses, cake top, etc. to the reception site?

The next step is to discuss the event's schedule and times. When does she want her toast, first dance, cutting of the cake? There isn't a specific order when coordinating a reception. However, here are some things to consider. People will not start dancing until after the first dance. If the bride and groom want a party atmosphere, I suggest having the first dance at the beginning of the celebration. Also, people like to leave politely after the cake is cut and served. She would probably would want the cake cut towards the end of the reception. However, you do not want to put it off until too late in the event. Keep in mind the guest list! The very young and old will probably get tired and impatient. The bride and groom will not want all of their guests to leave before they cut their cake!

Here is one of the basic orders that I have used and it works well: Cocktail hour (allows time for photographer to take formal bridal party photos); introduction of the wedding party; introduction of the bride and groom; toasts; first dance; father/daughter dance; mother/son dance; salad is served; entrée is served; dance; toss of the bouquet and garter; cutting of the cake; and dance. A good DJ or band leader will usually run the event and make the announcements. However, on that day, you will need to meet with the DJ and photographer before the reception to discuss the order of the event! Kindly ask the DJ to check with you before making any announcement. A really good one will do this automatically! Take it for someone who learned this the hard way! I had a DJ who decided to announce the champagne toast before the champagne was served!

That reminds me of an important thing to share with you. I know you want this day to be perfect for your best friend. And I am sure it will! However, keep in mind that things can and do go wrong. "Murphy's Law" often comes into play. So, when problems surface, don't let them see you sweat! Come prepared with an open mind, sense of humor, flexibility, and a thinking cap! Before the event, imagine all the horrific scenarios that could possibly occur and determine how you might handle them. This way you'll be well-rehearsed and ready to handle just about anything. Then, when a problem arises, you'll be able to come up with a quick solution! If caught in time, nine times out of ten, your girl friend won't even know there was a problem!

Another thing to discuss in great detail is room layout, room design, and table design. Where in the room does she want her head or sweet heart table, gift table, cake table, bar, and dance floor? Is there a stage that needs to be placed in the room? Where does she want her entertainment to be set up in the room? What kind of power do they need? How does she want her favors, centerpieces, menus, and candles arranged on the table? Does she have a seating chart? Does she need a table for seating cards? Does she need table numbers? What colors is her linen? Does she have table overlays? What napkin fold does she want? Does she have lights or other decorations that need to be put up for display? Draw diagrams and discuss her vision in great detail!

On "the day" come early and ready to get dirty! Call the reception site ahead of time and ask when the room will be ready to decorate and when you can move into the room to start decorating. Usually, they allow 1-2 hours before the event. However, keep in mind that some places schedule events in the same space prior to your event! Be flexible and come prepared with a plan!

Right before the wedding, refer back to your notes. Have all details been addressed? Have the table designs been completed? Are there enough silverware, wine glasses, and champagne glasses on all tables? Is there a cake plate, napkin, and cake knife available for the cake cutting? Is the head table set up? Are all the tables out and are in they in correct placement in the room? Do the tables have table clothes and skirting? Who is going to light the candles, check the room temperature, and check the restrooms before the event? After the room is set up, introduce yourself to all the vendors and work with them on all of their requests.

Finally, as a team, refer to the bride's schedule. Be flexible on the time. A wedding could run late! Just go moment to moment and be available at each step of the way. Before you know it, the event will be over and you will have just coordinated your first wedding reception like a pro! Congratulate yourself on a job well done!