How Well Do You Know Your Child?

Many parents are looking for that proverbial magic bullet that will make all of their parenting struggles a distant memory. Realistically, this is never going to happen. But there is one thing that every parent has at their fingertips that can help unlock the mysteries of parenting: your child! That's right. Your very own child can be the key to help you crack the code of parenting. All you have to do is know them. Piece of cake you say? Take this quiz and see how well you really know your child. Using a sheet of paper, complete each sentence below for all of your children. Try to be as specific and descriptive (using observable behaviors) as you can.

1. I know my child is upset when . . .

2. I know my child is sad when . . .

3. I know my child is excited when . . .

4. I know my child is nervous when . . .

5. I know my child is scared when . . .

6. I know my child is content when . . .

7. The two strongest emotions my child expresses are:

8. My child becomes frustrated when . . .

9. My child is calmed or comforted by . . .

10. My child feels heard when . . .

11. My child feels loved when . . .

12. My child's best attributes are . . .

13. My child is most responsive to correction when . . .

14. My child is motivated by . . .

15. In the past year, I have seen the most improvement in . . .

How did you do? Did you struggle to finish any of the sentences? If you found that you had difficulty finishing more than 5, you have some research to do. In the coming weeks, keep a journal handy. As issues arise, write down the situation, emotions that were evoked, their behaviors and the resolution.

Now, if you found these sentences easy to finish, your work is still not done. You have some self-assessment to do. Ask yourself these questions: "How often do I use my knowledge of my child to help him resolve an issue?" "Do I jump to what is easiest for me rather than what is most effective for him?" "How can I better use my knowledge of my child on a day to day basis?"

The hard truth is that parenting is difficult. Our children are unique and what works for one will not necessarily work for another. However, knowing your child can be a wonderfultool that will enable you to be the most effective parent you can be.