How to Win an Argument

It happens many a time that we enter into an argument with our partner, sometimes on trivial matters. It depends upon us how we wish to end the unnecessary argument. When two people are arguing, it is difficult to judge, who is right and who is wrong. Both will say that they are right, till a third fellow joins their arguments and act as a neutral observer. I myself often land in such situations, where an argument starts on a trivial issue and it goes on and on, without reaching a conclusion. I sometimes get perplexed how to finish an argument. Some of the partners make it a practice to argue on each and every issue, without realizing that some of the matters could be sorted out, without entering into an argument. But it becomes a practice and habit.

Once I went to my friend's place. Before I could enter, I heard that he and his partner were arguing with each other. As I entered, their arguments died down. I could guess, it was my friend who while closing the arguments said - "OK! You won, and I lose". Soon, his partner left the house on some pretext. I asked my dear friend what happened, he told me the story in brief and when I probed him further and desired to know why did he conceded defeat. He said - "If I need to end an argument, I say to my partner - 'I concede defeat', thereafter the argument ends, it does not mean that it is I who actually lose the battle (argument), it is the way to calm her down, I know that I was 'right' in my stand and I won the battle." He added - "My partner also feels happy that she has won the argument and I in my heart of heart know that I have not lost the battle, this makes me feel contended and satisfied".

He elaborated further that I feel that if one has to be mature enough, he needs to follow a principle - "Maturity is proportionate to the amount of embarrassment one can tolerate", so more I have the power to tolerate my partner's behavior, more mature I become".

I thought that my friend was wiser than his partner. Though, he might have ended the argument on a losing note, yet he had won, without her partner realizing it. I also felt that I should take a leaf from my friend's wisdom.