How to Write a Memoir Without Hurting Your Relationships

A person writing a memoir may have a remarkable story that would result in a best seller and get world wide attention- and a lot of money. However, does what you have written have the potential to hurt your relationships with family and friends? This is an important question that a memoir writer must ask himself or herself. Here are some tips to follow that will allow a writer to document events in his or her memoir without hurting personal relationships with people who were involved in the events.

Fuzz Details
Sometime accurate details are not important. This thought holds when you are accounting for events and situations that only impact yourself and another person. No one else or just a few people may have knowledge about the incidents. However, disclosing the event to the public may embarrass the other people involved. So instead of giving their exact names, appearances, occupations, and age, gender, etc.., change them. Even blur some details of the event, like the location where the event occurred and the time of year and day it occurred. Even twit the cause of the event itself. These actions can protect the other people involved in the events from being identified by the public. Remember only do this if the events are insignificant and will not impact the public.

Consult The Characters
If a writer is recording events that are absolutely essential to the memoir and the details of the other person involved are absolutely necessary, consult the other person. Go over the details of the past, and explain to him or her why it is important for you to write them in the memoir. Ask them for help and advice on writing the event in the memoir. Ask for their recollections of the incidents. Involve them.

Do Not Be A Vengeful Writer
Sometimes people use their writings as a way of getting back at someone who wronged them in the past or disagreed with. This can be very hurtful to the other person and incite the public against him or her. Instead of writing with an ax to grind, just tell the story and include the prospective of the other person.

Focus On Your Own Experiences
A writer can never go wrong at writing self-deprecating stuff about himself or herself. Often times memoir writers focus too much on the mishaps and missteps of others instead of inserting more of themselves in the book. They feel too ashamed and do not want to look bad. However, when a person read a memoir he or she expects to read about the writer, not just how the writer was treated by others. The reader wants to know what the writer thinks and feels and what the writer instigated in the lives of other people. This shows that the writer is human like the reader. Thus the reader can relate to the writer. So instead of writing about your friend's habit of eating boogers, write about your fear of girls when you were a sixteen-year-old boy.

In conclusion, be considerate of your friends and family when composing your memoir. Tell them you are writing the book and ask would it be all right to include them in it. Also ask for their input. You will find that family and friends will be receptive to the memoir, and the memoir would become more interesting.