Humor: Pet Peeves

In my life, thankfully, I can't justifiably complain about much. I have a wonderful husband, two beautiful children and a happy home. We do, however, have an ample amount of annoying quirks or pet peeves. To be fair, I have included my top ten ridiculous complaints along with my husbands.

My Peeves

1. My husband uses nail scissors instead of nail clippers. I know that's ridiculous, but they really gross me out!

2. He cleans up the mess in the kitchen before I am done cooking. Hey, where did my cutting board go?

3. He rearranges the dishes I have already put in the dishwasher. Do you want to clean up all by yourself?

4. He "short sheets" the bed. Yeah, he actually does make the bed, but who wants the covers to stop at their armpits?

5. He has a compulsive need to get rid of change. When you're in the drive through and there are fifty people in line behind you, just give them a bill!

6. He circles the parking lot for the perfect spot. We've got legs. Just park somewhere and we'll get some exercise!

7. He always peels oranges in one big humongous piece. Is that some kind of circus trick? Someone had a little too much spare time as a kid!

8. He purposely puts a hole in a marshmallow bag because he likes to eat them stale and crunchy. You're one of a kind dear!

9. He always wears his shirt tucked into his pants. Sometimes it just looks silly!

10. He asks me to pop zits on his back because they are itchy. Is this a guy thing? Just plain gross!

His Peeves

1. I often put a new roll of toilet paper resting on top of the old one. I know it's lazy, what can I say?

2. I let the dog sleep on the bed when he's working the night shift. I know she's a shedding nightmare, but she likes to cuddle!

3. I never water the plants and blame him for killing them. It's true. Plants do not last very long around our house.

4. I keep the oven light on and still open the door to check on the food. It's just not the same. I need to see it!

5. I give him a two-page "To-Do List" when he's clearly already busy. If I don't write it down, I'll forget. Besides, if I give the list to him, it's no longer my problem!

6. I don't buy gas. I do run the van on empty waiting for my husband to fill it up. Isn't gas dangerous? Maybe I've been watching too much news...

7. I make my husband answer the phone. Yeah, girls are supposed to like chatting on the phone, but I guess I lost that passion somewhere after my teenage years. Sometimes, when I'm by myself, I just don't answer it!

8. I cut a pineapple from the bottom first. I'm sure it does use up more room in the fridge. I guess I'm just not logical when it comes to fruit!

9. I'm not interested in watching sports on television. I didn't watch or play team sports as a kid and I just don't get everyone's fascination with it. My husband knows if he wants to watch an important game, he better get Pro-Line. I do like to gamble!

10. I put CDs and movies back in the wrong cases. If you want something, just ask me. I remember where they are!

It's fun to have silly annoyances about your partner that you can jive them about once and a while. How dull would life be if we were all the same and nothing ever bothered us?
Hubby: Would you put the @@#$$ pen down and help me pack up the van?
Me: Okay, but let's take the truck. I think I'm running low on gas!