I Am Declining Your Farm Town Invitation

Amanda King
Dear Facebook Friend,

I regret to inform you that I am declining your Farm Town invitation. Please do not assume that I no longer want to be your friend. That is the farthest thing from the truth- even though we have not spoken since middle school. In all actuality, I just do not wish to play an application that mimics farming. Don't be upset. I still wish to read your status updates on Facebook. I just don't want to farm. This letter comes to you as a way to save us both time. Now you do not have to spend the time writing and sending an angry message to me. I know you have a farm to tend- as I can see on my friend feed- and I'm sure that you can understand that I am very busy as well. Well, not very busy... but busy enough. What? I do stuff. Anyways. Here are a few reasons why I am rejecting your Farm Town invitation (all 20 of them that are currently in my notification box):

I do not like farm animals.

Honestly, I find farm animals a little creepy. Although they are very tasty in real life (when cooked at the proper temperature) I must admit my irrational fear of farm animals. Especially pink horses, blue pigs, and purple cows. I never liked farm animals- unless I'm picking them up from the freezer section.

I already have a fiance and a dog.

My mornings are pretty busy as it is. I make sure the dog is fed and walked. I make another pot of coffee because the first was too weak. I eat breakfast, make phone calls, and work out. I make sure my fiance is ready for work, which usually means having to go on a mad scavenger hunt of the house for his cell phone and/or lighter before he is out the door. I do dishes, clean up the messes left behing my fiance and dog... I'm sure you get the idea. So once I do get to Facebook, the last thing I'm thinking about is taking care of a farm. Even if it is a fake farm. It doesn't sound relaxing or fun. The extent of my Facebook use is to click the "like" button a few times and post the occassional status update. I really don't feel like taking care of anything else when I'm on Facebook.

I can- and will likely- become an addict.

I smoke. I drink too much coffee. I eat too much chocolate. I play too many other video games. I've already spent way too much time playing Farkle on Facebook. The last thing I should do is add another possible addicition to the mix. I already have enough addictions to tend to. I don't need to add Farm Town to the list. I would never get anything done if I did.

Facebook Friend, I am sure you understand my reasons for declining your Farm Town invitation. I just cannot fit it into my already allotted Facebook time. Please do not be insulted that I did not help you find the owner of that purple cow or helped you out on your farm. I already have too much to do without a fake farm. I would still love to be your friend. Just not your farming friend.

 

Sincerely,
Mandi K

Published by Amanda King

Mandi is an accidental Alaskan, originally from Ohio. She is a mortuary science student, political junkie, Denver Broncos fan, and self-proclaimed "Master of Ramen". She lives with her fiance and a basenji n...  View profile

11 Comments

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  • Sebastian Thomas5/20/2012

    Haha too funny, thanks and great article!

  • Snidely Whiplash12/5/2010

    Nice one! I am about done w/ Facebook...if I wanted everyone on this rock to know where I am and what I'm doing, I'd call 'em and tell 'em, right? Social media has become just too damned much for my old, cantankerous ass!

  • Eric Pudalov3/22/2010

    This is hilarious...simply because it's so true! I must admit that I joined Vampire Wars, but I haven't kept up with it lately, and it was mainly so I could write an article about it. I love your sardonic wit and bitter tone. Keep up the great work!

  • Mike Oberg1/18/2010

    I've heard a lot of retired people are joining FaceBook JUST to play FarmTown! I am retired but I can't imagine this! I can spend plenty of time and have more fun reading AC articles and comments. And, occasionally, writing an AC article!

  • Pattie Byrd1/10/2010

    I'm with you, Amanda. I tried one of those farming things not realizing how much time it took. I had to sell my worthless farm with all its dead crops.

  • Lorraine Yapps Cohen1/8/2010

    I'm with you, Amanda. I decline too.

  • J. Darling1/8/2010

    I grew up on an actual farm and the work wasn't very cute or fun!

  • Rick Soisson1/8/2010

    Common sense and humor prevail! What is it with Americans now that they all seem to have time - Mandi sensibly excepted - for games that a bright 14-year-old would reject? In the past year, a great many analysts have suggested a great many reasons for the struggling economy. Has anyone looked at the time wasted by adults on this kind of BS?

  • Roz Zurko1/8/2010

    This is a needed article! I won't do this either, I do not have the time! I feel the same way, I do not want to hurt feelings of anyone, but I do not want to farm, for you, me or anyone else. Very good article!

  • Roz Zurko1/8/2010

    This is a needed article! I won't do this either, I do not have the time! I feel the same way, I do not want to hurt feelings of anyone, but I do not want to farm, for you, me or anyone else. Very good article!

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