I Am to Die

I am to die
drowning
by myself
with the water
closing in around me
and the captured air
getting hot
and thin
and my suffocation
smothering
the light of my existence
and me-
gasping
helplessly
for any hint
of cool
clear
oxygen.
I smile
to myself.
-of course.
Breathing in
hard and sharp
and stabbing
cold
thick
water
fills
my awkward
lungs-
I can feel myself
shutting down
choking
and spitting
and receive my death
as my memories
and experiences
drift away
into the night
long away into the night
into particles and atoms and energy