I Believe in Miracles

Sometimes life isn't fair. You don't get the job or the guy or life treats you pretty shabby.
But I still believe in God. I have loving parents, even though they split up. I have a career I'm starting as a writer. And I lost forty pounds, through diet and exercise and quieting my mind. I am a true believer in miracles. Life can be pretty scary sometimes and living in a sleazy state like New Jersey makes you pray everyday for change.

I have been afraid of being raped since I often get grabbed at. But since I listened to that passage in the bible to "Be still and know that I am God" that hasn't happened too much. Often times rape happens by people you know. And that scares me since this one guy keeps stalking me. But I can't dwell on the negative. I can't live carrying mace every time I go to Morrison for church. I try not to dress to sleazy. In fact I think I dress fine.

I also know the importance in being humble and knowing that God tested Job even though he was doing nothing wrong. And I have questioned God on occasion. Like why don't I have a date? Why do my bosses try to hug me. What is so wrong with me that I get called J-lo? And they're supposed to be my friends. All I did was try to be loving and kind and my church turned into a freak show.

It attracted all sorts of creeps leering at me and I got scared. So I told this bruiser looking guy to leave me alone under no uncertain terms and he left church. This other guy was so disrespectful he would check out my ass and then say he was just my friend. I told him to take a hike. I didn't trust him as far as I could throw him. I am not here to amuse you. I had a friendship with a guy that I fell in love with him and he just wanted to be my friend and it broke my heart.

It seems like life just isn't fair. But we don't have to be negative and tear other people down because the world doesn't revolve around us. We're not God. But we were made in his image and we are precious. Like lilies of the field, we grow and die. But we are loved.