"I Can't Stand This Kid!" How to Handle Kids Who Won't Listen

Did you ever have to babysit a child who felt they did not have to listen to you? Or do you dread you're your nephew coming to you house knowing he will just tear it apart?

One of the best parenting tips I ever heard was "Not only should you enjoy the company of your own children but others should too."

I heard this when expecting my first child. I never wanted anyone thinking of my family and thinking "OH I hope they don't bring their kids!" or "oh no! They brought their kids."

Let's say you are a college student & one weekend you are asked to watch your brothers & cousins. Your brothers are say 10 & 11. You actually get along with them & have fun together. But your cousin? He is a terror. He is an only child & full of energy. His parents let him do whatever he wants & often ignore his bad behavior. If he is bad in school it is his teacher's fault, if he throws things at people it is because he is a boy & if he is told no you better watch out. He is only 6 but acts like he is two. He won't share, he calls you names and you just don't like being around this spoiled kid.

Why is he like this?

Your cousin has picked up bad habits because his parents let him get away with things. This in turn creates a lot of problems for other people who will not give into his behavior. He does not know how to listen to the word NO because he rarely hears it.

Sadly there isn't much you can do. You can talk to your aunt or uncle but I don't think that would help much. They already put up with this. Most often parents who have children like this don't see the problem. He is a boy & boys are wild. He is only 6 & so why should he share. He is having fun and really not hurting anyone when he throws the remote across the room. At least it didn't break a window, right?

You can though be very firm and just as stubborn as he is. Let him know you won't put up with it. This is how I handled 2 kids who were spoiled and wouldn't listen to me. I was 17 & asked to keep two very spoiled out of control kids. They were 5 & 2. The 5yr old threw temper tantrums better than her 2yr old brother. This child kicked me, hit me and tried to bite me. She made me so stressed I almost naturally get stubborn like her.

Let's look back at the situation with the spoiled 6yr old cousin -
Say it is lunch time and you are trying to fix lunch for your brothers & cousin.

Your cousin refuses to sit down, refuses to tell you what he wants to eat and refuses to come into the kitchen. He sits playing a video game and ignores you.

You keep fixing lunch. Maybe walk up to him and say "It is time to eat come show me what you want then we'll have lunch." He ignores or fusses at you. Saying "You are not my boss. I don't have to eat now!"

Walk away and fix lunch for yourself & your brothers. Go to your cousin again "It is time to eat. I'm about to sit down so tell me what you'd like to eat & I'll fix it for you." He looks at your mad & screams "NO! You are not my boss!" then plays his game.

Walk back into the kitchen, get your lunch, sit down with your brothers and start eating.

He comes into the kitchen after awhile and complains how he is hungry and mad you didn't fix him any lunch. Calmly remind him you asked him twice. If he stomps, fusses, screams and demand food just calmly say "I'm sorry but remember I asked you what you wanted. You will have to wait until I'm done then I'll fix you something my brothers & I need to finish eating first."

Stand firm and if he won't listen then repeat it over & over again like a broken record . He will get tired of it and most likely walk away mad but he will know you mean business.

After you are done you can ask him again what he wants to eat. Later if he fusses to his parents tell them "I asked him twice what he wanted to eat but he wouldn't tell me. My brothers & I were hungry and ready to eat."

The same method is used for almost everything. If he won't turn off the tv to go to bed kindly remind him TWICE and that is it. After the time is up unplug the tv if you have to.

Don't yell at him but remain calm. Repeat your requests and what you expect to be done and leave it at that.

But remember it is not your job to teach him how to share or listen to an adult in charge. This is a job his parents should have done but failed to do it. Sadly their lack of discipline makes things hard for you & others. Parents seem to forget that. They want to spoil, love and make their kids happy by not saying NO but in the end it makes for a very spoiled hard to handle child & the teen years won't be a piece of cake either.