If You Are a Coach You Have Critiques

Everybody seems to have an opinion on everything. And most times everybody thinks their opinion is right. Coaching a sport at just about every level can and will leave a person open to large amount of criticism. Your style of offense, your defense, your player rotation, your attitude, your personal life and any other topic they can find to criticize, they will. Sometimes the criticism is easy to deal with. Many times the criticism can seem impossible to handle. How you deal with each situation will be extremely important to your success as a coach.

Why do people find it necessary to criticize the coach? I am not sure there is one correct answer. At the professional and college level it seems that most people believe that it is ok because that coach is paid and it is part of their job. At the high school level most of the criticism appears to come from parents who feel that their child is not getting a fair shake from the coach. At the youth level the reasons seem to be all over the board. In my experience I have found that much of the criticism a youth and high school coach undertakes is most commonly a personal issue with a single person.

Commonly criticism at the high school and youth level arises from a parent who is sure that the coach doses not like their kid. The coach may not play their child as much as another child so obviously in their opinion dislike of their child is the only answer. Is this true? In some situations it may be true. In my experience I rarely find those situations. Coaches who play one child more than another normally have a solid reason. Of course the level of play directly determines a coach's rotation. A person coaching at the first and second grade level will more than likely play every child equally than a person coaching at the high school varsity level.

Unfortunately this is not the only criticism a coach at this level will encounter. Many fans and spectators will too often find any reason to criticize. A very popular topic seems to be a coach's personal life. Anything and everything a coach dose in their personal time seems to be of utmost importance. Sure if a coach is involved in some sort of illegal activity it should be brought to the attention of those parents and administrators whose children are in direct contact with the coach. Coaches do need to be role models and lead by example. However many times the criticism will go much further than that. The coaches' job, spouse, children, hobbies, clothes, or just about anything else will be brought up in public trial.

Recently I was talking with a baseball coach that I have known for thirteen years. This person is not a great friend of mine but is a person who I have spent many hours visiting with over the years. This coach is a family man who works outside the school and spends all of his free time with his family and supporting the baseball program he has built over the past ten years. During the summer the coach along with his wife and some other friends were out on the town when they ran into some parents of some of his players. They all set around talking and enjoying some drinks for a couple of hours. Three days later the coach was called into the principals' office and informed that there was a complaint filled with the school regarding his weekend.

My friend is still coaching at that same school and there was no real action taken over the complaint. This coach was on his own time. He did not drink and then go to practice or a game. He did not drink and drive. He simply went out with some friends on a Saturday night and walked home with his wife. However, a small group of parents found it to be inappropriate and spread it through the community. Although nothing officially came of the situation, it was spread through the community and caused this coach and his entire family much grief.

Where dose is stop? Where is the line drawn between a coach's personal life and their coaching duties? There is no clear answer. When a person steps up and becomes a coach at any level they need to understand that their entire life is on display. Fair or unfair, this is the way it is. The severity of this is determined by the level in which they coach and the individual community that they coach in. But it has always been there and it always will be. So how as a coach can a person deal with it?

Many coaches quit. For those people this may be the correct answer. Each individual has to look at their own unique situation and decide if dealing with the criticism is worth the stress and grief they will have to face. For others coaching is a very rewarding and enjoyable job that they can not seem to live without. For those people learning to deal with the criticism is extremely important. Prevention should be the first step.

How do you prevent criticism? You will not prevent all criticism but some can be. Do not think you have to become a hermit in your own life, but taking a few thought out steps will help. Choose your social situations carefully. Never socialize in situations that are close to your team. Do not hang in social settings with parents of your players. Never discuss your coaching during social settings. Never discuss your social or personal activities with your players. Encourage the rest of you coaching staff to do the same.

Often coaches will socialize with other coaches. This can be a great thing due to the fact that most coaches have a lot incoming and often can not socialize with others in their community without the fear of saying or doing something wrong. However, this can also be very dangerous. Coaches when socializing together always seem to focus on their team and the conversations always seem to lead back to that topic. Not a problem if you are in a private environment. However in public you are being watched and ease dropped on.

It may not be right but as a coach everything you do is being observed by someone. It is important that coaches understand that and do not put themselves in a situation in which something can be used against them later. People love to gossip and when a person only hears bits and pieces of a conversation they always fill in the blanks on their own. And we all know the blanks they fill in are never accurate and always very detrimental to you.

The criticism you can not prevent will always be there. How you deal with it will be up to you. I have found that it is never a good idea to over defend your actions. You will never be able to convince a person or group of people that they are wrong. The best thing you can do is keep going and learn from each situation. From time to time you may find a piece of criticism that will actually help. Use that information to become a better coach and move on. If as a coach you fight every negative that comes from your critiques you will fail as a coach. Focus on your program, learn from your mistakes, do not become a critique yourself and enjoy the opportunity you have been given.