If I Won the Lottery

Every so often the multi-state lottery in which my state lottery participates reaches a level that catches my eye: $95 Million, $250 Million, et cetera. Of course the jackpot is never expressed as so-and-so-many-million dollars, it's expressed as $95,000,000 or $250,000,000. The jackpot amount for the March 28, 2008 drawing of Mega Millions is $113 Million (or, put another way, $113,000,000) with the up front cash option at $71.2 Million.

The odds of matching all five numbers PLUS the "Megaball" is 1 in 175,711,536. Most daunting, to say the least. So while I'm studying ways to reduce the odds to be in my favor, I've started thinking about the ways my life would change with $71,200,000 in hand or with $12,500,000 a year for twenty years. After all, with odds of winning like 1 in 175,711,536, what you're really doing when you plunk down $1 or $2 or $100 or even $1000 is leveraging the opportunity cost of buying a ticket against the dream that you'll beat those odds.

Here are the dreams my $2 in opportunity cost have bought me for a couple of days. My father used to say he would make 2 phone calls: one to a travel agent and one to the place he used to work. Me? I might not even quit my job, but I know what I would want to do.

$367,200: Lamborghini Murciélago

Lamborghini has had a troubled 30 years, surviving bankruptcy, receivership, Chrysler, and Tommy Suharto to come under the ownership of Audi AG. With Lamborghini's logo of Bull, it is only fitting then that the 2002 replacement for the Lamborghini Diablo was the Murciélago, named for a bull which survived 24-sword strokes during a bull fight and whose life was ultimately spared. The 0-60 speed is 3.8 seconds, with a 9.5 second ramp up to 100 mph and a top speed of 205 mph. This is not an automobile for the rational, as no rational person need attain a top speed of 205 mph. Nor is a $300,000 automobile a requirement; one can procure a more than satisfactorily serviceable automobile for substantially less money.

So why have one's mind set on a top of the line Lamborghini? This is an automobile of passion. This is an automobile that is not required to go from point A to point B. This is an automobile that announces that not only does the driver appreciate the absolute finest things in life, he can also afford the absolute finest things in life. With a net worth that has just increased by approximately $100,000,000, this announces to the world I have arrived. It also announces that I have also probably won a lottery, because very few people who have actually earned $100,000,000 would spend their money so recklessly on such an automobile - outside of, say, Kobe Bryant.

Up to $2,500,000: Private Island Estate

Since I'm no longer working, I figure I'll have plenty of time in which to relax and pursue some new interests; interests such as snorkeling, underwater photography, and perhaps...well, I don't know, competitive sunbathing or money laundering - not illegal transfers of money to hide illicit activity, I mean washing my money...I've got a lot of it now, remember?

Initially, my thought was to buy my own island, but that wouldn't fly. In thinking about the cons of an island, there wouldn't likely be the accoutrements to which I've become accustomed, and would require such things as indoor plumbing. Since I ONLY have $100,000,000, I have to be somewhat frugal in order that my winnings aren't completely drained.

For $2.5 Million, there's a 1.5 acre villa available on an island in Jamaica. This isn't a private island in and of itself - there are three other villas on the island - but I'm thinking it would be sufficiently secluded that I wouldn't notice the other 4 families on the island.

$80,000 yearly: Personal Dental Hygienist

Yeah, that's right. I've got a lot of money. I shouldn't have to brush my own teeth in the morning. I figure I could hire some spectacular dental professional whose only responsibility would be to clean my teeth in the morning and at night. That's it. Okay, maybe shampoo my hair too, but I'm certain that would come at an additional cost.

In the Boston area, $80,000 is in the 75% percentile of Dental Hygienist salaries. I figure that this number is more than satisfactory according to a recent Boston Globe article, a solid butler's salary would be in this range. That and the relatively light work load involved.

$200,000 yearly: Dennis Drinkwater's Red Sox Season Tickets

Dennis Drinkwater runs a company in the Boston area called Giant Glass. I'm not entirely sure why I know that, other than the fact he has the season tickets to the best seats in Fenway Park - right behind home plate. I win $113,000,000 and I want at least two of those seats. I figure each ticket is worth about $98,000 or $1,200 a game for 81 games - plus any playoff games. I'm not sure I know what I would have to do to actually pry those tickets out of his hands, and if I did, I wouldn't write about how much I would be willing to part with - after all, I have a 2 in 175,711,536 of winning the loot - just in case I'm having my Dental Hygienist make some phone calls on my behalf.

The Reality is...

I'm not spending everything and I'm not winding up living in a trailer park. My interests and needs are relatively modest...okay, the $350,000 Lamborghini...yeah, and the $200k for baseball season tickets. Otherwise, I'm not buying up helicopters and sure as shooting my family knows not to ask me for money. I also know that unless I'm pulling into lottery headquarters to grab up a lump sum of $71 Million, all I've got is a yearly salary increase. Buy a multimillion dollar home, you've got taxes to pay on it. Yikes!

Let's face it - unless you win the big prize, all you're really looking at is a yearly salary. Win $1 Million, paid over 20 years, you've gotten yourself a $50,000/year salary. This likely isn't going to change your life enough to buy a Lamborghini. In 2006 the median household income was $48,201.00. If you figure a 3% increase every year of a 42 year working life, that amount works out to be just over $2 Million. If you win $1 Million over 20 years, all you've done is increase your lifetime earnings by 50%.

But if we're talking dreams, with all due respect, I'm not dreaming of $1 Million. I'm dreaming of $113,000,000 over 20 years...or $71,000,000 right now.

RESOURCES:

• http://corybantic.us/blog/2006/03/24/how-to-win-the-lottery/

• http://www.zimbio.com/Lamborghini/articles/15/Lamborghini+consistently+top+10+among+most

• http://www.privateislandsonline.com/pellew-island.htm

• http://www.boston.com/jobs/news/articles/2008/03/23/carry_on_jeeves/

• http://articles.moneycentral.msn.com/SavingandDebt/SaveMoney/8lotteryWinnersWhoLostTheirMillions.aspx

• http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Household_income_in_the_United_States