Important Conversations To Have With Your Babysitter

ruth vera
Expectations

Your sitter should have a good idea of what you expect out of her. Though babysitting involves taking care of your child, the term itself is very vague. Try telling her what you would like her to do for your child and also inform her about the things you do not expect from her. For instance, you may want her to help your child finish his/her homework, but you might not expect from her to clean up after him/her.

If you expect the sitter to do more jobs than what is normally accepted as a standard task structure, then make sure to fix her pay accordingly. For instance, if you want your sitter to do the laundry while taking care of your child, let her know that you would be more than willing to pay her more for that!

The kind of expectations that you may have out of the sitter would largely depend on the amount of time you wish to spend away from your child. However, it is wise to note that overloading your sitter with other routine tasks would keep her away from her main duty at hand.

Style

As a parent, you definitely follow some 'style' to deal with your child. You could be a stern parent or a rather liberal one. Let your sitter know about your parenting style so that she can adopt the way she would deal with your children accordingly. In your absence, you would want your child to be looked after in a proper manner. Tell your sitter about the rules that you have made form your child and ask her to respect the same.

Personality

Give your sitter an idea of what your child's personality is. For instance, your child could be short tempered or may be mild mannered. It is important to let your sitter know how your child is so that she can orient herself better when it comes to the task of looking after your children. If you talk to her about your child's personality, you will allow her to make up her mind about how to deal with your children.

She could then devise strategies that would allow her to spend a smooth time with your child. Lastly, if your child is a brat, then she has an option to flatly refuse to take care of him/her rather than discovering this situation on her own terms!

Siblings

Often, you may expect the sitter to look after both your children. In such a case, it is important that you tell her how well your children connect and what sort of activities they love to do together. She can even be informed whether there are frequent conflicts between your kids, and over what reasons your children usually fight. You can even tell her who the actual troublemaker really is; after all, you would want to assure yourself that your children would not be squabbling behind your back!

Cultural expectations

It is not necessary that your sitter would belong to the same caste or religion as you do. If you are particularly religious, you may wish to hire a help belonging to the same caste as yours. In case your sitter happens to follow the rituals and teachings of some other religion, here are a few things that you should keep in mind.

The first important thing that what actually sets people of two faiths apart is the food that they eat. There could be special rules about the consumption of food or the manner in which it is to be consumed. Let your sitter know about your expectations and tell her about the type of food your children are allowed to have.

The second issue that needs to be dealt with is prayers. If you and your kids pray in a particular way, or at a particular time; let your sitter know about your routine, but do not make it mandatory for her to join your children in such activities.

The best thing to do is to teach your child to pray at a certain time; expect your sitter to just remind your kids about the need to do the same.

The third thing that matter the most is the issue of clothes. You may expect your children to dress up in a particular manner to suit your religious sentiments. Let the sitter know about it and ask her not to influence your young child in matters related to food, clothes or fashion!

Code of conduct

Establish some ground rules about the way you expect your sitter to behave. For example, you may not want to encourage her to behave frivolously or dress up in a revealing style in front of your children.

Ask her to keep her friends away from your house to keep a check of any untowardly behavior. Ask her not to watch movies or listen to music that has adult content when she is with your children.

Tell your sitter to avoid reading books that may scare of your child thus making it hard for them to fall asleep. Most importantly, tell her to watch her language. You do not want your child using slang words most inappropriate for their age!

Acceptable punishment

Tell your sitter that it is her responsibility to see to it that your children behave well even in your absence. Leave her with the discretion to ' award a punishment' to the child who is ill behaved. However, warn her strictly to never hit or strike a child.

The sitter may adopt strategies like talking patiently to the child, reminding him or her about the rules you have set, setting a good example by ' behaving' right, separating fighting siblings and scolding the one who is at fault, being fair etc. The idea is to let your sitter know what you expect as a form of punishment.

Festival time

There may be times when you may need to go out on Christmas or Halloween's night. Of course, we can assume that such trips where you may need to keep your child at home would only be emergencies! Instruct the sitter and clearly explain to her about what she is expected to do in case such a situation arises.

For instance, tell her to keep away the gift wrapping and ribbons after opening Christmas presents. You may ask her to accompany your child on a trick-or-treat session. It is essential that your child enjoy the festival in your absence while remaining safe.

Reporting rules

Of course, it is a must that the sitter reports to you about your child's behavior. This will allow you to decide how you need to discipline your child or train him to be better behaved. Establish a commonly agreed upon method of reporting. For instance, your sitter could write down the list of activities with your child in your absence.

She could make a special mention of your child's bad behavior. However, as a parent, you must learn to listen to both the sides. Ask your child whether he has behaved in a manner that he should not have. The chances of the sitter reporting your child's misbehavior in order to cover up for the lack of attention on her part are not to be overlooked.

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