Improve Your Life by Improving Your Relationship with Your Parents

Here is a question: "What kind of relationships did you have with your parents?" In most cases I hear a short answer something like "Wonderful!" As if anyone doubts it and they want to avoid this subject.

No matter how wonderful relationship we had with our parents in our childhood these relationships are the main reason we get our problems that chase us for the rest of our lives. Another thing is that it's very difficult to find a connection between our problems and our relationship to our parents. Our lifestyle, the way we think, the way we deal with our problems - everything has its roots in our family. In most cases we start to copy everything we saw as children. It is a vicious cycle and there is only one way out - to see this cycle, release and forgive everything and start building your life the way you want it.

Our mind has one specific quality - it completely blocks the most unpleasant memories from coming into the conscious level. That's the reason why we remember mostly pleasant situation from our childhood and only small fraction of memories we have about horrible situations.

If we want to release our past we need to recall those unpleasant moments when our parents made us to feel pain by being insensitive to us. While these memories and negative emotions are in our subconscious mind they will influence our life in a negative way. Once we remember something painful we need to try to let go the hatred, we need to forgive our parents whatever pain they made us to feel in the past. There is no other way if we want to bring harmony in our lives. That's the foundation of our happiness.

Do you actually know how interesting our relationships with parents are? Whenever we try to get away from our parents their image is always besides us. They are in the figures of our bosses or lovers or spouses. In most cases we chose our partners and spouse who are similar to our parents. This similarity can be in physical appearance as well as in personality. In other words we "marry" our father or mother. It may sound contentious but it's logical. Who was the first man whom a little girl loved? Father. A woman growing up is looking to choose a man who is like her father (even if she did not have a good relationship with him). She is doing it subconsciously.

The similar situation happens to men. Sometimes the opposite situation takes place. It can be that a man "marries" "his father" and a woman "marries" "her mother". It all depends on the relationship between parents and child in the family. We marry a person who is similar to one of our parents. He or she is the one we need to forgive and accept the most. This is the way we learn our lessons in life. This is the way we work on improving ourselves.

Why does mother in law usually hates her daughter in law? Since they both have a lot in common. They reflect each other like a mirror. They see themselves in each other. Since they're very few people who actually love and accept themselves mother and daughter in law hate each other.

No matter how hard we try to escape our problems they will be always with us because the root cause of our problems is not outside of us it's inside. And no one can escape from himself.