In Defense of Alec Baldwin
What Have You Done that No One Knows About?
I don't have children myself, and I don't think it's okay to call people, any people, mean names. But I've seen a lot of parents doing things that are just as bad in public to their children and they aren't on the covers of every gossip website and tabloid in the world. They aren't even explaining themselves to social services. What I think people have forgotten is that parents are just human beings. They have good and bad days, and can be driven past the point of reasonable by many things. I remember how I acted toward my parents when I was just a bit older than Alec's daughter; truthfully, I'm surprised my parents still talk to me.
While I think what he did was wrong, I don't think we can assume that Alec Baldwin is a bad parent. Every person has something they don't want other people to know. We've all done something, most of the time to other people, that is ugly, mean, cruel, or nasty.
I've always been grateful that I'm not a famous person because I'd hate to have someone taking my picture when I stop for a Twix at 3am. I'd hate to have people comment every time I gained or lost 8 ounces, had a bad hair day or didn't help an old lady across the street. But more than anything, I'd hate to have other people judging who I am by the most sensational things I've done. Like just about everyone else, I'm sure Alec Baldwin gets up in the morning and goes through his day doing mostly normal things. I'm fairly certain that in this instant access, gossip-hungry society, if he were being abusive to his daughter we'd hear about it. These are not the days of Mommy Dearest where Hollywood handlers protected everyone's secrets - there are no secrets anymore. Can a man not make one mistake in 11 years without being called an unfit parent?
My parents are wonderful people, and were good, caring parents. I wouldn't trade them for any other person on earth. They made good decisions and tried to do the right thing. But I'm pretty sure that if we went back and recorded every single thing they said or did for 11 years, you'd find something bad. Something which, if repeated, could be considered abusive. I'd be surprised if anyone can say that their parents are perfect. Truthfully, when I first heard the message he left his daughter, I thought, "Now there's a man driven over the edge." And if you think you, as a parent, can't be driven over the edge, I'd say you're in for a rude surprise at some point in the future. Every person has their breaking point, and Alec Baldwin is just a person.
I don't call for people to ignore abuse. But to assess a person's value as a parent based on one single instant is not only harsh, it's unrealistic. Give the man a break.
Published by Sydney Ellis
Sydney is a former training specialist who now spends her time in HR consulting, traveling, and writing more words than are necessary. View profile
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11 Comments
Post a CommentI'm sorry, but accidentally doing something wrong and calling your child a rude, thoughtless little pig in a grown-up version of a temper tantrum are two completely different things. One bad move doesn't make a bad parent, but this isn't comparable to normal mistakes like accidentally yelling at your child "KNOCK IT OFF!" or forgetting to change a diaper. Being imperfect and being immature are quite different.
None of us can really be sure of what happened in terms of the release of the call. Ireland may be a child, but kids usually have much more savvy about technology & I'm sure she knows all about uploading things to websites. Some speculated it was her. Again, who knows - but this we do know: Alec Baldwin is abusive - no matter how anybody twists it - he's an abusive, angry, scary person - those are the only facts we're sure of in this sad incident.
Parents are supposed to be adults, thinking before they act and taking responsibility for their mistakes. Did Baldwin call his daughter right back up after that abusive phone call and apologize? Has he apologized to her privately? He may not be able to contact her via phone, but he could certainly send her a letter. I'm not a perfect parent, but I would never dream of cursing at my children, calling them names, or otherwise belittling them no matter how frustratingly they behave at times.
I want to know why no one has called Kim on the carpet for releasing that phone call. I'm a parent -- 2 that I gave birth to and 8 that I raised and if someone recorded a 30 second portion of some of the conversations we've had, I'm sure there would be some judgemental commentary. But we aren't in the public eye and the real crime here, in MY opinion, is that Kim used this recording after losing another court battle to really discredit him. Apparently she has set only specific times that she allows him to call his daughter and otherwise turns the phone off. Quite frankly, again in my opinion, she should be the one who is being held up for public verbal flogging.
The whole story is much deeper than one phone call. He has been claiming his ex is 'unstable' for years. If he can fly off the handle, and lash out at a child for what was it, Not picking up the phone? It goes to show how unstable HE is. He gave Kim the proof she needed. Don't fall for this manipulative mans' charm.
http://joyannwrites.blogspot.com/2007/04/alec-baldwin-point-we-are-missing.html
That other parents do bad things to their children or worse doesn't mean that Alec Baldwin's actions were any less horrible. Those other parents are as guilty as them, and when most people see them doing those things, they are just as angry as they were about the Alec Baldwin situation. It just isn't publicized because it's not news. It was wrong, and so was his "I'm a victim!" bullshit apology. Nothing anyone else does makes his actions any less wrong or excuses him at all. Any parent can be driven over the edge, but if you think all or most parents insult their children at some point, well, I really feel bad for the kids of the parents you're observing. He is just a person, but his daughter is just a CHILD who doesn't deserve to be called names. Parents should have more maturity than that.
@ Paul Bright - I couldn't agree more. I thought Alec Balwin was the scum of the earth long before this little incident.
Scott- Well articulated! Thanks for your contribution.
Paul- Too right.
Timothy- Indeed, where is Kim?
His mistake didn't bother me nearly as much as his "I'm a victim" apology. C'mon! It wouldnt' have hurt to just leave it at "I was wrong. I should never have said those words to my daughter, regardless of the circumstances. I violated her trust as an adult. I hope she can forgive me." instead of "wah. I got caught mouthing off. waaaah. I'm a victim of parental alienation. wahhhh btw sorry Ireland waaaah I hate Kim waaaah". Dang right we all mess up. But to apologize and blame his circumstances? C'mon! Good article.
Well Christina, I think you don't have the brains or the decency of a human being. You are a rude, thoughtless little pig.