In Need of a Fresh Start?

Have you ever blown it? I mean, really blown it? Who hasn't? We all have times when we need a "do over." None of us are perfect. We all make mistakes.The worst part of really blowing it is that it can be hard to get back to where you want and likely deserve to be. Fresh starts allow us to wipe the slate clean and regain or even surpass what we've lost.

Here are a few ways to start fresh, when you've blown it big time.

Analyze What Went Wrong

Chances are, if you don't consider what went wrong and how to avoid making the same mistake again, you'll end up in the same bad shape, even after a fresh start. For instance, many people pay off debt, but in a short time, are deeply in debt all over again. Or a woman may get out of an abusive relationship, only to later be attracted to another man with the same abusive qualities as the man she left.

Depending on the severity of the situation that requires a fresh start, you may need a counselor to help you figure out what went wrong and how to avoid making the same mistake again. Others can process the past failure or mistake with friends, or through journaling.

Apologize

An apology may not be necessary for a fresh start, but chances are, if you've blown it with other people, you will need to apologize. An apology is not an admission that you were solely responsible for everything that went wrong, but it is an important step in owning your part in the situation. It can be difficult to move forward when you haven't totally come clean about what went wrong, so as difficult as it may be to apologize, do it anyway. When you apologize, remember that you're not responsible for how the other person responds.

Allow Time for Recovery

Failure, particularly in relationships or business, can be emotionally and even physically draining. If at all possible, take some time to rest and recover before jumping into a new situation. For instance, if you've been fired from a job, if your finances permit, it may be a good idea to give yourself at least a week or two before starting right into a new job search.

Too long of a break can lead to lethargy or mental or emotional paralysis, so it could be helpful to set a time limit and the objectives for the break. For example, you may decide to take a week off before looking for a job and during that week, do certain specific things that you know will refresh and renew your body, mind and spirit.

Change Your Setting

In extreme cases you may need to change your setting in order to start fresh. For instance, if you've really made a mess of things on a job to such a degree that it will be almost impossible to regain a good reputation, it may be time to get another job.

In the most extreme cases, you may even need to move to a new location where others don't know you and won't judge you based on what has happened in the past.

When you've really messed up, remind yourself that others also make big mistakes and get through it. Today is a new day, and a chance for a brand new start. Take advantage of that and look forward to a future with a clean slate.