In the Ring Now: The Kinkculture Versus the Social Networking Tycoon

Google 's acquisition of YouTube is but one example of the fact that dot.com enterprises can - once again - make millions of dollars. European theater and musical tycoon Joop van den Ende recently pumped millions of Euros into the Dutch six million users networking site Hyves. We all know about the enormous amount of Facebook dollars and there are more to follow. The only problem for many is: "dirty cars do not sell very well".

What happens is this. Big investors want nice clean networks. Filled with money spending teenagers preferably or well to do senior citizens and upper middle class housewives. They want to market their iPods, mobile phones, ringtones, make up, music, etcetera. They do not want romance-seeking guys with computers on attics and by all means they don't want to see leather loving, latex enjoying kinksters in their network. Because, even though the "adult" market always has been and still is by far the largest online industry in terms of money as well as surfers, that may create an "image problem".

As a result of this, the non-mainstream sexual crowd - in more modern terms known as the kinkculture - falls victim to what is actually very rude discrimination. Profiles (and as a result entire networks of social contacts) are wiped out by the dozen every day on MySpace, Facebook, Hyves, Netlog and all other general-oriented social network sites. Nobody says sorry. Everyone - if at all - points to vague "Terms of Service". Everybody steps on civil rights, freedom of expression and the freedom of speech like there is no tomorrow. The kinkculture is once again an easy victim. Video shots of skinheads happily beating up other kids on YouTube are no problem. One bare nipple is!

This is by far not the first time, this happened on the Internet. When Yahoo! started wiping up many of the late 1990's "listservs" (email based discussion lists) and turned them into what is now known as Yahoo! groups, literally thousands of alternative networks fell prey to Yahoo's Bible Belt activists inspired "spring cleaning". MSN a few years later delivered the next blow when terminating its chat rooms and closing down all adult-oriented groups. And now: it is happening again.

Newsgroups, listservs and MSN-groups are nothing else but early attempts to create social networking. Which - if you happen te be "different" - usually very quickly tuns into anti-social networking. If you like leather, or members of your own sex, or like to dress up in women's clothes every now and then, you're simply not welcome. And once again the kinkculture community has trouble creating alternatives.

The reason for that is very simple. Setting up social network sites is expensive, labor intensive, requires a lot of expertise and very quickly a team of people that can support the site. That requires dollars and nobody is pumping big money into community supporting organizations. As a result, these organizations once again find themselves struggling with problems such as: how do we get the message across, the badly needed information and education and how do we reach out to those who need, want and have every right to communicate.

Just because someone enjoys to be blindfolded in bed that does not make him or her a dangerous or deranged person. But that is what many - including governments, big investors and the social networking big shots - would like you to believe. In fact, research showed decades ago that well over one third of the adult population is into some kind of "spicy lovemaking". Most just do not like to talk about it. Because ...... well, for one thing that can get you banned from MySpace.

Is there an answer? Yes there is. The kinkculture always bounces back. The have been doing that for decades and they will do it again. Kinkculture initiatives are already being born and they may very well grow rapidly, dollars or no dollars. Why? Well, those who are being discriminated very quickly learn to fight back and find other ways to get what they want. And what they want is a very basic human need: the ability to talk to others and find like minded people.