Insight into Insecurity

What does he think about me? Is he cheating on me? Is he going to leave me? To some women, these thoughts occur in passing, to others, it is an all out obsession. At a pivotal point in a relationship where two becomes one, something strange occurs in the female mind. Where we were once a strong, independent, self reliant, (roar) woman, we start to doubt ourselves. When a man becomes comfortable enough to enter into a monogamous relationship, he is just that comfortable. Sometimes, we as women perceive that as boredom.

As women, we often feel the need to fix things, even when to everyone else, our relationship appears ideal. A lot of our insecurities stem from a decrease in sexual activity between ourselves and our partner. Spontaneity has been replaced by a certain routine. As a man sees it, the sex is there, there is no reason to try so hard, or to look elsewhere. Women, on the other hand often see it as a lack of interest from their partner, therefore, he must be having sexual encounters with someone else.

As men move into the comfort zone, the compliments are fewer and farther between. He may feel that he has said it once, it does not have to be repeated. We, however see it as a change in feeling. In the beginning, the notes, the flowers, the e-mails for no reason stole our hearts. When the romance is replaced by nights in front of the television, we wonder.

It is by no stretch of the imagination abnormal. Insecurity becomes a problem when it consumes you. At the point where you can accomplish nothing else for thinking about what he is doing right now, you need to look inside yourself and find the cause. Before wild accusations start to fly, you need to be sure that there is a reason behind your thought process. It is possible that subconsciously, a woman may be bored with the relationship and is looking for a reason to end it.
I can tell you that if you are not the one looking for a way out, talking, (not accusing) is the only way to make a your relationship work. I don't mean chatting with the girls, more often than not, operating under the guise of being supportive, they will inadvertently back up your suspicions. It is always best to turn off the television, take his hand and ask him. Give him the chance to defend himself, and he might just surprise you.