Interview with Kel, a Former Prisoner and Corrections Officer

I met Kel on Myspace when she joined my "Shackled Women Inmates" page. She messaged me privately and mentioned how she had previously been incarcerated and wanted to get involved with prison reform, and advocacy work. I thought it would be a great idea to interview her, and let the public read what it's like for a woman in prison.

Kel, could you give us a bio of yourself?

I am 34 years old, divorced mother of two children. I currently live in New Hampshire. I also served time in a Texas State Prison for 5 years. Before serving time I had also been a correctional officer in Texas at a mens facility.

I understand you was incarcerated for several years in Texas, could you tell us what you was convicted for and where you was incarcerated?

I was incarcerated in a couple of facilities located in Gatesville Texas. I was at Terrace Unit, Sycamore Unit, and Hilltop Unit. I was convicted for Sexual Assault. I was in a relationship with someone that was more than 3 years difference than me, it was consensual but the state picked up the charge.

Do you feel you had adequate legal representation, and is there anything about the legal aspects you would like to tell us about?

While I was in county Jail I could not afford a lawyer so I had one appointed to me. I had never been into trouble before so I knew nothing of the legal system. It took them 6 months for me to even go to court and then the lawyer didn't really listen to what I was asking of him. I do remember when I finally went to court, my lawyer told me that I would not have to get up and testify because I was pleading guilty but when I got in the court room I was asked by the judge to come forward to testify. I feel that because I knew nothing of the legal system that things were pulled over my eyes.

Do women in prison have male guards, and what problems do women have with this?

Women in Prison do have male guards. The guards don't see you as a person, you are only a number to them, unless of course the male guards are wanting something sexual from certain inmates. The male guards would do favors for those certain inmates such as bring things in from the outside world just so that those women inmates would be hush, hush about it.

Is there any difference in women being in prison than with men being in prison?

I don't feel like there is a difference in women being in prison than a male. I am saying that only because I have seen both sides of it, Once as a correctional officer and then as an inmate. Both men and women facilities have the same mess going on in it, but nobody listens to what another inmate has to say about a situation. It's basically sit back and watch what happens.

What abuses do women face in prison.

Women face Sexual Abuse from the guards and also from other inmates. I had seen a few incidents when two female inmates were in a relationship and one inmate sexually and physically abused her girlfriend. I also have seen women inmates being mentally and verbally abused by the male guards, constantly screaming at them for no apparent reason in front of everyone.

Did you receive visits, and what were they like?

I did receive visits but they were only once a year. So I cant really say too much about the visits. I do recall when I first got into the system, I was actually still in the processing part of it. I had not been assigned to a unit yet, and my family had come to see me. The facility did allow me to see my parents when in reality they didn't have to let me, but because they had come from out of state, they allowed the visit but it was a non-contact visit.

It was nice to have visits when I did but the process that I went through just to see my parents was hell. It was embarrassing to me and my family. When I arrived into the visiting room, where my parents were at, I had to go into a bathroom with a female guard and she had to strip search me for any contraband. It was humiliating to me to have to do that in the sight of my parents.

Are there many women in prison with children on the outside, and what do you know about this situation?

Yes, There are so many women that are incarcerated and have children on the outside. I was one of them. I had no visits with them due to my ex-husbands choice. There is so many women that have children either teen-agers or children that were even born while the mom was incarcerated, That in itself is hard to watch a woman go through. I had a close friend that had her son while she was incarcerated and I watch it tear her apart every day. Being a mother incarcerated is one of the toughest things, EVER..

Are there any programs of rehabilitation for women in prison?

Yes, There are many programs for rehabilitation for women in prison but most of them you can only attend if you are about to go home. They don't allow anyone to just attend certain programs, I recall the only one that they let anyone attend was the AA meetings. Other than that NO. I attended a course called "Changes". Its a program to get an inmate ready for the outside world, such a job hunting and those such things. I attended an anger management course while incarcerated. They also allow inmates to attend college. I attended a computer course and completed half of my associates degree in science. The programs are there it's just having the desire to do better for yourself while incarcerated.

Upon release, what requirements do they put on a woman inmate?

They require you to attend certain classes such as the "CHANGES" course, usually about three months out to going home. As for myself I had to attend a Sex offender Program in which I had to complete. It was not required to complete before going home but you would be in the program segregated from the general population.

What are your plans for the future?

My plans for the future is to go back to college in which I am tyring to attend but it is not easy because of the criminal background that I have. I am looking into going into the Culinary Arts to become a chef.

When I first came home I had a job within two weeks of being home and held that job for 3 years. I recently have been let go due to an injury at work. I now work part time as a security officer. a few nights a week and plan to go to school within a month or so.

Do you feel you will ever end up in prison again, and what are the reasons some women return to prison?

I feel that I will never end up in prison again. That experience changed my life completely in so many ways, such as the relationship that I have with my parents now is excellent. my mom has become my best friend. At one point in my life I never thought that would be possible. We always fought. I have learned not to take things in life for granted anymore, down to the littlest things such as the freedom to go to the bathroom when needed and not when told, the freedom to take a long shower if wanted. The things that I once took for granted are now very precious to me.

I believe that some reasons that women go back to prison are either they were locked up for a long period of time and just don't know how to become a member of society again because they are so instutionalized . They don't know how to do things on their own because they were always told what to do and when to do it in prison. Others return to prison because they don't want to take responsibility for themselves and get a job, so they return back to criminal behavior because they just don't care anymore.

After completing this interview Kel emailed me with the following:

You know the other day when I did that interview for you and i came to that question about whether I thought that I would go back to prison and why do people end up back in prison. I think I found a good answer for it the other day, through personal experience... I am currently looking for a full time job and I am having struggles because Of my criminal record. I have basically been told that no one will hire me. but you know what if someone would give me the chance, they would have a better outcome with me than with someone that has no criminal background. Those people would be more apt to quit the job or get fired. I am the type of person that once I have a Job I do whatever I can to make sure I keep it, because for me jobs are hard to come by. If society would just give the ones with a criminal background a chance, they would see what I am talking about, but because they don't we revert back to the ways of making easy money such as drug dealing or things of that nature in which in the long run will land a individual back in the prison system once again, like a revolving door.

At this time, if there is anything you would like to add to this interview, please do so.

I would love to do whatever I can to help with prison reform. I would like to show others that inmates can be rehabilitated, I am proof of that.