Interview with a Recovering Agoraphobic

Agoraphobia, fear of wide open spaces? Not really. The truth is, agoraphobia effects everyone differently, and everyone has their own "triggers" that can lead to a panic attack. I wanted to get inside the head of someone suffering from this affliction to gain a better understanding of the condition, symptoms and effects on their life. To protect her identity we will use the name Sandy Smith for purpose of this interview. I want to thank Sandy upfront for her honesty in speaking about this condition and her experiences.

Jeziah - Many people don't have a clear understanding of what agoraphobia really is, and although I know it effects everyone differently can you tell me a little about your agoraphobia.

Sandy - Agoraphobia didn't just appear in my life one day, it was a slow progression that really started back when I was a child. My family would describe me as a nervous child, and God knows I was. Agoraphobia is really about situations and circumstances that trigger panic attacks. For me it started out with just elevators, but over time I added flying, driving long distances by myself and Disney rides to my list. All things I avoided to avoid panic attacks. But everyone it's different, I know people that can't drive over bridges or go to restaurants, so it really does affect everyone differently. I have also met people who say the onset of their agoraphobia happened after a traumatic experience.

Jeziah - Can you describe a panic attack?

Sandy - Yes, I could do so in my sleep as I have so many. Let's see....in no specific order my panic attacks do the following: make my heart race, make me feel dizzy and disoriented, my hands become so sweaty they practically drip, my mouth becomes dry, I find it hard to breath and will feel sick to my stomach. You feel like you are going crazy. You feel like you have to get out of the situation you are in to stop the feeling, to stop the panic. You want out. In short, panic attacks can be true hell for the sufferer.

Jeziah- So how did your panic attacks lead to agoraphobia?

Sandy- Ah, well, one day you are somewhere, say an elevator, and for some unknown reason you start to feel nervous, you associate being on the elevator with the feeling of being nervous, and you start to avoid the elevator. Mine is definitely situational anxiety produced attacks but I know plenty that can have panic attacks sitting right at home, I believe that is considered "generalized" anxiety. There is still so much we don't know about anxiety disorders in my opinion.

Jeziah - Do you feel this disorder had held you back or made you miss out on things in life.

Sandy-Absolutely, no doubt about it. I missed out on going on a family cruise several years back for example. I went on my first cruise this past July and I am doing another in March. I turned down jobs that required driving long distances and of course the whole elevator avoidance issue made life hard for a long time. I don't want to think about how many flights of stairs I have gone up in the last 20 years.

Jeziah- What steps have you taken to conquer the agoraphobia and have they been successful?

Sandy-Well, in my opinion I think Anxiety, in some people, if not all, is really a chemical imbalance. I tried every kind of therapy you can think of....individual therapy with a psychologist, group therapy, and even hypnotherapy. For me, none of these things worked, though I did see them work for others.
After years of frustration I turned to medication to deal with the problem. Not valium or xanax but medication to prevent the attack from happening, I take Zoloft, and I have seen a huge improvement in my disorder though I know its still something I have to work at mentally. Sometimes I still feel a tendency to avoid and often give myself a little push and realize I am OK. There is one thing I have yet conquered, but its because I truly have not attempted it, and that is driving long distances alone.
But in general I think I have made great headway in my recovery. The medication has helped a great deal but attitude and mindset are just as important. I think it's really imprint for people dealing with Agoraphobia and anxiety issue to learn "how" to relax.

Jeziah-What made you finally decide to seek out the medication option?

Sandy- I think I was sick and tired of working so hard to stop my panic attacks when they would happen. It can be exhausting trying to avoid one and I knew I was missing out on many things in life I wanted to get the chance to experience.

Jeziah - What have you learned from speaking with others with this disorder?

Sandy-Well, I have learned that it really effects everyone differently and what works for one person may not work for another. Also one medication that works great for me, might not work for someone else. There is a lot of trial and error to recovery in my opinion. Talking to others and learning about their experiences was a good thing, it helped me realize I wasn't crazy and I was not the only one dealing with the anxiety issues.

Jeziah-And your thoughts on seeking help with a therapist?

Sandy- I think even if someone opts to go on medication, learning about their anxiety, learning to relax and how to deal with issue is very important. The more you know about what ails you the better right?

Jeziah - How have family and friends dealt with your agoraphobia issues?

Sandy-Some have been wonderful, some lose patience from time to time and some just ended up leaving my life. Not everyone could deal I guess. My family has been my biggest support system. My sisters also suffer from various degrees of anxiety issues so we have been able to compare notes and encourage each other a great deal. We have all gotten each other through some tough times.

Jeziah - Yes, I had heard that Anxiety disorders can run in families, was their a history of it that you know of?

Sandy - My Mom went through a period of time in her 30's I believe where she had panic attacks. She beat though and had never looked back since. I think my Aunts also had some anxiety issues as well.

Jeziah -I want to go back to talking about panic attacks for just a moment. You have described the effects a panic attack has on you, but what happens when the attack ends?

Sandy-It's funny the truth is, they tell you in counseling that you need to really stop and think about the panic attack itself. Is it going to kill you? No. Will it last forever? No And when it's over?
You will be fine, its only a panic attack and it's important to realize that. Before I was on medication, if I was able to really talk myself out of the attack, I felt great. If I had a full fledged panic attack I was always exhausted afterward, but fine nonetheless.

Jeziah - What other advice or insight can you share with someone currently dealing with Agoraphobia?

Sandy-Along with learning to relax, you have to learn how to talk to yourself. Have you ever heard about someone who was able to do things that usually they avoided if a husband was with them? Or a particular person was with them? The husband or that person becomes their "safe place." They start to associate not having the attack if that person is with them. One of things that is important is really learning to become your own safe place, to know you can handle the situation on your own, that is why learning "How" to talk to your self is so important in conquering agoraphobia or any anxiety issue. Another thing I think is helpful is looking at your diet. It's a pretty known fact that caffeine is not a good choice for people with anxiety issues, neither is chocolate for example.
I think in dealing with Agoraphobia or anxiety issues, someone should look at the mind and the body both. I guess the biggest step is really taking that "first step" to finding what will work for you.
You don't have to live with limitations, you don't have to live with panic attacks and fear. But you have to want to conquer it, that's half the battle right there. Get counseling, talk to your doctor, read books, talk to others, exercise and eat as healthy as you can....conquer it. And know the best is yet to come if you do.

Jeziah - I can't think of a better closing statement for the interview.