Intimidating Women: Why He Goes for the Chubby Friend

You and your friend spent hours getting ready to go out. You found the perfect outfit, you meticulously styled your hair, your nails are done, and your new stillettos are killer. You walk into the bar with your head held up and your super confident smile on your face. You grab a table and it isn't five minutes before the first guy comes over to chat, but he's not interested in you. He wants to talk to you friend, the chubby one.

You know you have done everything right, you spend hours in the gym and have read all the books about how to attract men so why doesn't it work? Often times beautiful women are passed over for their less attractive friends in the bar or night club setting. Don't take it personal. Let's look at why it happens.

You're too Beautiful

Of course this is the one we would all like to believe. Just tell yourself this the next time you get shot down. But in reality it may just be the case. Beautiful women appear to be too much of a challenge for men. Let's face it, if they're out prowling the bar for a date chances are they have only one thing on their minds. Why waste their time with someone who is so clearly out of their league when the not so cute friend is a much easier target and will probably require a lot less effort. It's nasty, but it's true.

You're Too Confident

Confidence is a good thing. If you look good and you're a catch then you should know it and show it to the world. Problem is it can also make you seem unapproachable. You know that smile you had on when you walked in the room? To you it said, "I'm confident and fun, come talk to me!" To him it said, "I'm probably way cooler than you are and will not bother to talk to you." He's protecting his ego. Can you blame him? You are probably cooler than he is.

You Seem Uptight

All that time you spent on perfection hit the mark. Now you look so perfect that every man in the room automatically writes you off as uptight. He assumes you won't be any fun and won't have any time left over for him after you have waxed every hair on your body and applied mascara to every individual eyelash. Your friend on the other hand, is not quite as perfect thereby letting him know that appearance is important to her but not her highest priority. This automatically makes her more attractive to Mr. Too Many Budlights.

He's Read The Game

There are tons of books out there, including The Game by Neil Strauss that will tell men to ignore the one they want completely and only pay attention to the less attractive friend. Yes, this is honest truth. They are taught that, but that saddest part is that it works. Don't you want him even more now that he doesn't want you?

So is there no hope for the beautiful woman that is looking for a great man? Do you have to ugly yourself up or appear less confident to attract a man? Absolutely not. That would be settling for mediocrity. The fact is this, if he is intimidated by you then you don't want him anyway. What kind of relationship could you have with someone that feels they are not worthy of you? Hold out ladies. Keep doing what you are doing. It's like a shield that guards against the losers and the weak. Somewhere out there is a man that will not fear you. Someone that is just as confident and beautiful as you are and he will find you. And when he does, he won't bother with the chubby friend. Trust me on this one.