Is an Abstinence-Only Policy Really What's Best for Our Students?

Something that I hear complained about to no end (by my own kids in high school) is how many schools these days refuse to teach their students anything but abstinence when it comes to the touchy subject of sex. Now, I will not deny that I hope my kids remain abstinent throughout high school, and the intentions behind the abstinence only policy are just, but I have heard, and thought of, some concerns lately. Is the policy really what's best for kids? Is it making things worse? Is it making things better? Does it make any difference of all? I invite you all to share some of these thoughts with me.

As parents, we often fail to see the negative consequences of enforcing an abstinence only policy on our kids. People, let's face it. Most of our kids are going to have sex. There's not a thing we can do to stop them or dissuade them. The most we can do is to educate them on the good and bad parts of sex. If we don't teach them, then who will? Certainly not the schools, or so I hear.

But on the other hand, if we teach them about sex, or if we allow the schools to teach them about sex, then we run the risk of promoting sex. We run the risk of making sex out to be a good thing (notice hypocritical statement to the left, please). But if we don't teach them, then they may want to find out by "doing", so to speak. When that happens, then we are directly responsible for putting them in danger of sexually transmitted diseases (I don't care what the politically correct nuts want you to say, it is NOT sexually transmitted infections!) or unwanted pregnancy.

So what is a parent to do? Is there any way to win? Try this method. Talk to your kids about sex, teach them about the pros and cons of having sex. Try to emphasize that it's okay to have sex with someone you love, but you should go off giving yourself to every other stranger you meet on the beaten trail. Put special emphasis on birth control techniques and protection.

Several reasons why an abstinence only policy may prove to be ineffective are as follows; when a school district or parent (a.k.a. an authority figure) adopts an abstinence only policy, then the student in question may seek to have sex simply to defy that authority. They may have sex just to learn how, which could be prevented if they were taught about sex in the first place.

Several reasons why an abstinence only policy might work are as follows; by shielding students from things sexual in nature, one might argue that they are less tempted. Passing out condoms or birth control pills in schools may be promoting sex, so it's better to deny them that protection. That's all I have for this one.

No sources were used for this article except experience.