Is it Abuse to Overfeed a Child?

The suffix "over" in itself has a negative connotation because "overdoing" anything is rarely a good thing. The term abuse also has a negative connotation and therefore the seemingly obvious answer to the above question would be an emphatic "yes" wouldn't it? Well, in today's modern US culture where lawsuit mania lurks at every corner of life and society, I hope that the person who introduced the topic is not seeking to make a case for a lawsuit because this essay offers no substance to make a legal case as I have no legal background or advice to offer but rather my view point and reasoning from my own form of logic.

If the person doing the overfeeding is conscious of the fact that he/she is overdoing something and persists in this action, then yes it could be called abuse depending on the motivations for doing so.

One big person I know who is struggling with obesity was indeed purposely overfed by her parents as a child. As an infant, she suffered from a birth defect which required frequent hospitalizations and her weight had dropped so low that in association with doctors, her parents administered as series of vitamin cocktails and weight gain inducing medications (and others which trigger the appetite) and fed her as much and as often as possible. Her hospitalizations finally followed by surgery proved to be successful and she got better. However, by the age of eight, she had become extremely obese and had to go into treatment once again, but this time to lose weight because her weight had become a serious health risk for her and she could no longer control her appetite.

The drastic diet prescribed to her was such that she could not eat starches nor pretty much nothing of the same things her siblings ate and she suffered tremendously from this often hiding to binge on the foods she craved. Eventually as she got older she was able to accept and adjust to her difference and understand and accept the reasons that required she follow a different diet, understanding the necessity and importance of it for her health. It still makes her suffer, but not as much and occasionally will treat herself to what she's not allowed to eat but knows when to stop and doesn't over do it.

This woman was indeed overfed as a child and it has lasting repercussions on her adult life but I still remember the puny weak and sickly toddler who nearly died and how her parents did what they knew best to save her life. Can this be called abuse? I think not.

Now, let's take the case of the stereotypical Italian mama (I'm just using the US TV image to state my case with no offense intended, cause actually, many mamas from many different countries and cultures do the same) who fills her kids' and family's plates (as well as that of any other person sitting at her table for that matter!) with food and insist they eat, in my opinion, clearly can in no way be qualified as abuse. Until the culture of stick thinness, came into style, eating and eating well was actually a good thing because it was equated with good health and a shield against illnesses. Unless someone helps her/him (this mama or even papa in some cases) to understand the risks involved if she's really overdoing the feeding, here again, the behavior can hardly be qualified as abuse.

Also, one needs to determine what exactly is "overfeeding" because in the title of this topic it appears that there is no agreement between two parties involved as to the amount of food that is considered adequate or inadequate.

Simply put, when I eat to the point where I feel full (the hunger is gone), naturally, I stop eating. Occasionally, I will eat more than necessary when I come across a type of food that I really love, can't have often, and/or haven't had in a long time; and usually if I really overdo it, my metabolism makes me pay dearly for my reckless behavior with a whooping big case of indigestion that I remember long after the savor of the food has left my tongue and throat. The souvenir of the discomfort and sometimes pain serves as a deterrent for future reckless eating binges. Besides, once I reach the point of being full while I'm eating, the taste even seems to change and doesn't seem as tasty as did the first spoonfuls or forkfuls, or mouthfuls, when I first started eating it, and I definitely know that I'm still eating it merely because it's there and not because I'm still craving it or because my body needs it.

Now in terms of feeding a child, some children have great appetites and others are just plain finicky and can make anyone freak out just from the sheer tininess of the portions they eat. In this case well, yes I would not resist cajoling the child into eating some more food simply to get some peace of mind and reassurance that the kid isn't going to faint somewhere while playing or doing something else. It is also well known that a scrawny child is less equipped for fighting off illness than a plump one (certain illnesses tend to make their victim loose their appetite and therefore loose weight and if there is no weight to loose it can be a scary ordeal).

Over-feeding a child can be a form of ignorance or just simply an unintentionally damaging form of expressing affection for a child or, it can be a form of plain neglect.

When I talk about neglect here is what I mean; a child needs to eat that's a given, but it also needs attention, affection and loving care. If mama or papa or big brother or sister or whoever the caretaker is wants to be left alone to attend to other things and finds that it is easier to just stick a bottle in a baby's mouth to get some peace or hand cookies, chips or some form of junk food, or even healthy food for that matter, just to keep the child occupied at doing something, then it's neglect and it's not fair to the child who unknowingly develops bad habits that are hard to kick later in life.

So in conclusion, I would state that unless there is force involved in the overfeeding, it's really difficult for me to agree that there is abuse especially if no adverse intent is manifest in the behavior of the one doing the feeding.