Is it Better to Date a Divorced Man or a Divorced Woman?

There are some interesting assumptions to be made about the dating lives of divorced men and women. Depending upon several sets of circumstances, people appear to have varying opinions. Dating from divorcee's perspective is often much different than the perspective of the typical single person. In many ways it appears that the single person has "nothing to lose"; this group of people has clean slates. The divorced person is almost always seen as one with "baggage." This isn't necessarily a fair assumption; but the stereotype does have some influence on how these groups of people relate to one another. Here are a few random theories about divorced daters and their effect on the dating world.

Men are more likely than women to remarry shortly after divorce.

This is a popular assumption, simply because it seems that men take greater issue with being alone. Another theory that supports this belief? That it is more difficult for a divorced woman to find another mate to marry. In an episode of "Sex and the City", one of the characters was told by her husband that if they divorced, she would find it more difficult to find a mate than he would. While this isn't necessarily the case in real life, the episode focused on this rationale as a fundamental truth. As a result, Carrie and her pals lamented over the belief that it is easier for divorced men.

Some unsupported stereotypes also cater to this belief. For example, it is assumed that a divorced man will remarry a woman who is younger. Additionally, some people believe that divorced women are much more critical of men they date in the future - thus making finding a new mate more problematic. But some research alludes to the opposite; in fact, many divorced women are much happier having left the marriage.

Some divorced men are less likely to remarry because they felt they got "burned" in their previous marriage.

This particularly belief applies to men who have had multiple divorces. Some people think that they may be less likely to marry again because of the financial implications of divorce. If these men have children, their child support and/or alimony payments may hinder their ability to start fresh easily. In some social circles you will find a lot of single women who date men claiming to be "separated"; from the man's perspective, divorce makes these financial details rather messy to work out. The number of women dating men in this position has grown exponentially.

So what does all this really mean?

Are men more or less eager to date a woman who has been divorced? This one is kind of tricky. In this society, it is typically the woman who bears the responsibility of housing and feeding the children of divorce. Thus, men dating divorced women are sometimes reluctant to get too involved. These women are also reluctant, as they have their children's welfare to consider.

One might think that divorced men and women find it easier to date other divorced men and women. And very often, this is the case. Divorced men and women often have a lot of things in common. But that doesn't necessarily mean that their blossoming romance is any easier than that of single people. But it is because of the stresses of marriage and divorce that websites like divorcedpeoplemeet.com exist. Ultimately, it depends on the attitude of the person engaging in a relationship with a divorced individual. Whether a person has been married or not has absolutely nothing to do with the amount of "baggage" that they bring to the relationship. At best, it might be assumed that single people are a bit more wary of those who have been divorced. But that doesn't necessarily make the situation better or worse...

SOURCES:

www.ivillage.com
www.divorcedpeoplemeet.com
www.psychologytoday.com
www.divorcesource.com