Is There Ever a Cause for Divorce?

The age-old question, "Is there ever really a good cause for divorce?" is, indeed, a loaded question. Many layers of morality, societal norms and social acceptance are wedged into this question. Perhaps you are getting a divorce yourself, and you are looking for a way out, or an excuse to continue with it.

Morality and Biblical teachings are some of the oft-used reasons for getting a divorce. "He cheated on me," or "We are not equally yoked together," and quite a few other phrases which I'm sure you can think of. However, the purpose of morality and/or religious texts is not to justify our own human desires. Rather, the purpose is to set some higher, non-human standards toward which to strive. No matter what religion you practice, the God of the Bible always returned to His nation of Israel after they had repented from going astray. The God of the Bible personally demonstrated forgiveness, multiple times and quite consistently.

Social norms fall into the picture of divorce easily enough. We are taught by the example of friends, family, acquaintances and strangers that if the going gets tough, there's an easy way out. Gone are the days when marriage meant a lifetime, and nothing short of rampant physical abuse or repeated, public infidelity would break two people apart. Even then, most people would make it work...and not unhappily. You see, commitment does, in fact, mean something.

Commitment does not mean "putting up with it" or "keeping up appearances." Commitment cannot truly be lowered to such selfish depths as "because it's more convenient than getting a divorce." Commitment is simply a recognition that a forever situation has occurred, and that no matter how long or tough the present trial happens to be, it will be over soon enough. Tighter bonds will be woven, trust will be torn down and rebuilt stronger and surer than before, and you will almost be glad that you went through hard times together. Even hard times that the two of you create.

Marriage is not for the faint of heart. It is a plant that must be daily watered, sunned and stimulated. If you have a real plant and it is not growing, then what is it doing? It's dying. You must keep your marriage alive with choices that only you can make. Choose to love them today. Choose to be the best marriage partner you can be to them. Choose to love who they are, instead of who you thought they were, or who you would like them to be. Choose to be married today. These choices effectively eradicate the need for divorce. For divorce is, indeed, for the faint of heart.