Is There Still an Atmosphere of Racial Oppression or is that Subject to Interpretation?

I believe that some black people, and other people of color', are living in a state of oppression. However I believe that the atmosphere of oppression is a matter of mental perception. I am a black female, living in Southern California, which is by and large an open minded and culturally diverse state. I am currently in a relationship with a white male, who works at our local college in the financial aid department. I am the first black female that he has ever dated, and I am certain where you to have asked him five years ago if he envisioned himself living with and engaged to a black woman, he would have been taken aback. Not that he is in any way, shape, or form a bigot or even a segregationist, but from the comfortable niche of his life before I came along, he would have, as I have several times pointed out to him, "laughed himself sick at the idea". He has only recently had to deal with racism and racial oppression and that only occasionally. I am not a stereotypical black female. I have managed to fall into some of the traps and pitfalls that are common to our race, dropping out of high school, becoming a mother at the age of 15, drug addiction etcetera. Although those bleak facts when taken alone would lead one to believe that I am indeed a white person's idea of the stereotypical "nigger". If one chooses to interact with me however they will find that I am quite intelligent with an agile and "thirsty" mind, I do not live, nor was I raised in the "hood", and when given the opportunity, I present and comport myself in quite the "socially acceptable" fashion.

I have experienced racism at it's ugliest in my life, and I have often wondered to myself whether I would have gotten a specific job, for which I am fully qualified, if I were a white male, as opposed to a black female. Certain situations and interactions that I have had in the past have opened my eyes to the fact that, while some people are not "racists" and are not "attempting to hold black's back", there are still people out there that have had little or no personal interaction with black people. Thus when they are confronted by a black person who is well spoken, obviously educated, with the requisite skills and experience to step into a specific job or social strata, they are dumbfounded and are not quite sure how to behave. Often, the way that these folks behave can be misconstrued as racist or oppressive. I have personally seen many a "brother" or "sister" act out in response to their behavior and thus live down to their expectations and misconceptions of "who" we are as a race.

This is what I refer to when I say that oppression comes not from outside ourselves, but from within our own minds. When we are quick to assume bigotry or racist mindsets and then act upon that impression, we do ourselves and our race a grave disservice.

Often what is misconstrued as racist behavior is simply a lack of experience and understanding on the part of both the perceived racist and on the part of the black person who is swift to label them as such. Case in point, one of my fiancee's best friends is black. Some would say that his color is only on the outside as he was adopted as an infant and raised in the Midwestern United States by a white family and thus is not "in touch" with his blackness. He was a high school Spanish language teacher, however after completing his master's program with my fiance, in Career and Educational Counseling he made a career change and is now working in the counseling field. He is not as aware of the stigmatism of racial preconceptions as his contemporaries from other less diverse walks of life. Regardless of what he perceives himself to be, he has educated himself and has established his position within his community and his chosen career. I point this man out only because, while he may be black, he is a living a complete and fulfilling life without the fear of oppression or racism. The way in which he lives, and the things he has achieved, are a testament to how the lack of racial boundaries and preconceived notions can remove those issues and stumbling blocks from a persons chosen path, even for a person of color. Oppression is often a matter of perception.